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I require only three things of a man. He must be handsome, ruthless and stupid.

Dorothy Parker

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Dorothy Parker
Age: 73 †
Born: 1893
Born: August 22
Died: 1967
Died: June 7
Columnist
Journalist
Literary Critic
Poet
Screenwriter
Songwriter
Writer
West End
Monmouth County
New Jersey
Dorothy Rothschild
Dot Rothschild
Dottie Rothschild
Require
Marriage
Stupid
Three
Must
Ruthless
Things
Valentine
Men
Handsome
Wedding

More quotes by Dorothy Parker

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When I was young and bold and strong, The right was right, the wrong was wrong. With plume on high and flag unfurled, I rode away to right the world. But now I’m old - and good and bad, Are woven in a crazy plaid. I sit and say the world is so, And wise is s/he who lets it go.
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Q: What's the difference between an enzyme and a hormone? A: You can't hear an enzyme.
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Where unwilling dies the rose buds the new another year.
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Innocence is a desirable thing, a dainty thing, an appealing thing, in its place but carried too far, it is merely ridiculous.
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I can’t write five words but that I change seven.
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It costs me never a stab nor squirm / To tread by chance upon a worm. / Aha, my little dear, / I say, Your clan will pay me back one day.
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Oh, both my shoes are shiny new, And pristine is my hat My dress is 1922… My life is all like that.
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This is me apologizing. I am a fool, a bird-brain, a liar and a horse-thief. I wouldn't touch a superlative again with an umbrella.
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Upton Sinclair is his own King Charles' head. He cannot keep himself out of his writings, try though he may or, by this time, try though he doesn't.
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Hollywood is one place in the world where you can die of encouragement.
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I like to have a martini/Two at the very most/After three I'm under the table/After four I'm under my host.
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The House Beautiful is the play lousy.
Dorothy Parker
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But I give you my word, in the entire book there is nothing that cannot be said aloud in mixed company. And there is, also, nothing that makes you a bit the wiser. I wonder--oh, what will you think of me--if those two statements do not verge upon the synonymous.
Dorothy Parker
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There's life for you. Spend the best years of your life studying penmanship and rhetoric and syntax and Beowulf and George Eliot, and then somebody steals your pencil.
Dorothy Parker
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And if my heart be scarred and burned, The safer, I, for all I learned.
Dorothy Parker
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I'm never going to accomplish anything that's perfectly clear to me. I'm never going to be famous. My name will never be writ large on the roster of Those Who Do Things. I don't do anything. Not one single thing. I used to bite my nails, but I don't even do that any more.
Dorothy Parker
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Once, when I was young and true. Someone left me sad - Broke my brittle heart in two And that is very bad. Love is for unlucky folk, Love is but a curse. Once there was a heart I broke And that, I think, is worse.
Dorothy Parker
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If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular?
Dorothy Parker
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I shudder at the thought of men.... I'm due to fall in love again
Dorothy Parker
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Mrs. Ewing was a short woman who accepted the obligation borne by so many short women to make up in vivacity what they lack in number of inches from the ground.
Dorothy Parker