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I was always sweet, at first. Oh, it's so easy to be sweet to people before you love them.

Dorothy Parker

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Dorothy Parker
Age: 73 †
Born: 1893
Born: August 22
Died: 1967
Died: June 7
Columnist
Journalist
Literary Critic
Poet
Screenwriter
Songwriter
Writer
West End
Monmouth County
New Jersey
Dorothy Rothschild
Dot Rothschild
Dottie Rothschild
Sweet
Easy
Firsts
First
Always
Love
People

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[On hearing that President Coolidge was dead:] How can you tell?
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The only useful thing I ever learned in school was that if you spit on your eraser it erased ink.
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Money cannot buy health, but I'd settle for a diamond-studded wheelchair.
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People are more fun than anyone.
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[Hospitalized and pressing the nurse's button before dictating letters to her secretary:] This should assure us of at least forty-five minutes of undisturbed privacy.
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I give her sadness and the gift of pain, a new moon madness and a love of rain.
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I don't want to review books any more. It cuts in too much on my reading.
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[On William Lyon Phelps's Happiness:] It is second only to a rubber duck as the ideal bathtub companion. It may be held in the hand without causing muscular fatigue ... and it may be read through before the water has cooled. And if it slips down the drain pipe, all right, it slips down the drain pipe.
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There was a reason for the cost of those perfectly plain black dresses.
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[On James Gould Cozzens' By Love Possessed:] It is a vast enterprise encompassing all sorts of love, except, naturally, those branches which extend to Jews, Negroes, and people who have lost track of their great-grandparents.
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At birth the Devil touched my tongue.
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Her big heart did not, as is so sadly often the case, inhabit a big bosom.
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[At the reception following her remarriage to Alan Campbell:] People who haven't talked to each other in years are on speaking terms again today - including the bride and groom.
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[On Katharine Hepburn's stage performance:] She ran the whole gamut of emotions, from A to B.
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That woman speaks eighteen languages, and can't say 'No' in any of them.
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[On being shown an apartment by a real estate agent:] Oh, dear, that's much too big. All I need is room enough to lay a hat and a few friends.
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Then she told herself to stop her nonsense. If you looked for things to make you feel hurt and wretched and unnecessary, you were certain to find them, more easily each time, so easily, soon, that you did not even realize you had gone out searching. Women alone often developed into experts at the practice. She must never join their dismal league.
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Friends come and go but I wouldn't have thought you'd be one of them
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I wish, I wish I were a poisonous bacterium.
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Summer makes me drowsy. Autumn makes me sing. Winter's pretty lousy, but I hate Spring.
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