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If I had a shiny gun I could have a world of fun Speeding bullets through the brains Of the folks that cause me pains :)
Dorothy Parker
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Dorothy Parker
Age: 73 †
Born: 1893
Born: August 22
Died: 1967
Died: June 7
Columnist
Journalist
Literary Critic
Poet
Screenwriter
Songwriter
Writer
West End
Monmouth County
New Jersey
Dorothy Rothschild
Dot Rothschild
Dottie Rothschild
Folks
Cause
Fun
Speeding
Causes
Shiny
Brain
Pains
Pain
Bullets
World
Brains
Gun
More quotes by Dorothy Parker
[On the ringing of her doorbell or telephone:] What fresh hell is this?
Dorothy Parker
[On an actor who'd broken her leg in London:] Oh, how terrible. She must have done it sliding down a barrister.
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[To the British actor who annoyed her by repeated references to his busy 'shedule':] I think you're full of skit.
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Friends come and go but I wouldn't have thought you'd be one of them
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She runs the gamut of emotions from A to B.
Dorothy Parker
But I give you my word, in the entire book there is nothing that cannot be said aloud in mixed company. And there is, also, nothing that makes you a bit the wiser. I wonder--oh, what will you think of me--if those two statements do not verge upon the synonymous.
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[From a window in the Writer's Building at MGM, which overlooked a cemetery:] Hello down there. It might interest you to know that up here we are just as dead as you are.
Dorothy Parker
Some men break your heart in two, Some men fawn and flatter, Some men never look at you And that cleans up the matter.
Dorothy Parker
A girl's best friend is her mutter.
Dorothy Parker
If, with the literate, I am Impelled to try an epigram, I never seek to take the credit We all assume that Oscar said it.
Dorothy Parker
Men seldom make passes at girls who wear glasses.
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Guido Natso is natso guido.
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The writer's way is rough and lonely, and who would choose it while there are vacancies in more gracious professions, such as, say, cleaning out ferryboats?
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Just begin a story with such a phrase as 'I remember Disraeli - poor old Dizz! - once saying to me, in answer to my poke in the eye,' and you will find me and Morpheus off in a corner, necking.
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I was always sweet, at first. Oh, it's so easy to be sweet to people before you love them.
Dorothy Parker
The sun's gone dim, and the moon's gone black. For I loved him, and he didn't love back.
Dorothy Parker
Said after she had been seriously ill: The doctors were very brave about it.
Dorothy Parker
Out in Hollywood, where the streets are paved with Goldwyn.
Dorothy Parker
Mrs. Ewing was a short woman who accepted the obligation borne by so many short women to make up in vivacity what they lack in number of inches from the ground.
Dorothy Parker
Now to me, Edith looks like something that would eat her young.
Dorothy Parker