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That woman speaks eighteen languages, and can't say 'No' in any of them.

Dorothy Parker

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Dorothy Parker
Age: 73 †
Born: 1893
Born: August 22
Died: 1967
Died: June 7
Columnist
Journalist
Literary Critic
Poet
Screenwriter
Songwriter
Writer
West End
Monmouth County
New Jersey
Dorothy Rothschild
Dot Rothschild
Dottie Rothschild
Witty
Funny
Woman
Algonquins
Language
Wordplay
Speak
Hilarious
Inspirational
Eighteen
Women
Languages
Speaks

More quotes by Dorothy Parker

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I know that there are things that never have been funny, and never will be. And I know that ridicule may be a shield, but it is not a weapon.
Dorothy Parker
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Nevil Shute's On the Beach is no Christmas carol, but it seems to me a remarkably fine novel, one which I read, in the peculiarly repulsive phrase, with my eyes glued to the page.
Dorothy Parker
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And I'll stay off Verlaine too he was always chasing Rimbauds.
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Of Orson Welles: It's like meeting God without dying.
Dorothy Parker
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She can sit up and beg, and she can give her paw — I don't say she will, but she can.
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I regret to say that during the first act of this, I fell so soundly asleep that the gentleman who brought me piled up a barricade of overcoat, hat, stick, and gloves between us to establish a separation in the eyes of the world, and went into an impersonation of A Young Man Who Has Come to the Theater Unaccompanied.
Dorothy Parker
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Drink and dance and laugh and lie, Love, the reeling midnight through, For tomorrow we shall die! (But, alas, we never do.)
Dorothy Parker
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If I don't drive around the park, I'm pretty sure to make my mark. If I'm in bed each night by ten, I may get back my looks again. If I abstain from fun and such, I'll probably amount to much But I shall stay the way I am, Because I do not give a damn.
Dorothy Parker
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The Swiss are a neat and an industrious people, none of whom is under seventy-five years of age.
Dorothy Parker
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There must be courage there must be no awe. There must be criticism, for humor, to my mind, is encapsulated in criticism. There must be a disciplined eye and a wild mind...There must be a magnificent disregard of your reader, for if he cannot follow you, there is nothing you can do about it.
Dorothy Parker
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...as for helping me in the outside world, the Convent taught me only that if you spit on a pencil eraser, it will erase ink.
Dorothy Parker
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People ought to be one of two things, young or dead.
Dorothy Parker
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There is entirely too much charm around, and something must be done to stop it.
Dorothy Parker
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[On an actor who'd broken her leg in London:] Oh, how terrible. She must have done it sliding down a barrister.
Dorothy Parker
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There was a reason for the cost of those perfectly plain black dresses.
Dorothy Parker
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She was pleased to have him come and never sorry to see him go.
Dorothy Parker
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What writes worse than a Theodore Dreiser? ... Two Theodore Dreisers.
Dorothy Parker
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I give her sadness and the gift of pain, a new moon madness and a love of rain.
Dorothy Parker
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I fell into writing, I suppose, being one of those awful children who wrote verses. I went to a convent in New York-the Blessed Sacrament... I was fired from there, finally, for a lot of things, among them my insistence that the Immaculate Conception was spontaneous combustion.
Dorothy Parker
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I can’t write five words but that I change seven.
Dorothy Parker