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I know this will come as a shock to you, Mr. Goldwyn, but in all history, which has held billions and billions of human beings, not a single one ever had a happy ending.

Dorothy Parker

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Dorothy Parker
Age: 73 †
Born: 1893
Born: August 22
Died: 1967
Died: June 7
Columnist
Journalist
Literary Critic
Poet
Screenwriter
Songwriter
Writer
West End
Monmouth County
New Jersey
Dorothy Rothschild
Dot Rothschild
Dottie Rothschild
Beings
Single
Happy
History
Ever
Ending
Human
Shock
Humans
Billions
Come
Held

More quotes by Dorothy Parker

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The Swiss are a neat and an industrious people, none of whom is under seventy-five years of age.
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I don't want to review books any more. It cuts in too much on my reading.
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His books are exciting and powerful and — if I may filch the word from the booksy ones — pulsing.
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[To the British actor who annoyed her by repeated references to his busy 'shedule':] I think you're full of skit.
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If you want to know what God thinks about money, just look at the people He gives it to.
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But I give you my word, in the entire book there is nothing that cannot be said aloud in mixed company. And there is, also, nothing that makes you a bit the wiser. I wonder--oh, what will you think of me--if those two statements do not verge upon the synonymous.
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Then she told herself to stop her nonsense. If you looked for things to make you feel hurt and wretched and unnecessary, you were certain to find them, more easily each time, so easily, soon, that you did not even realize you had gone out searching. Women alone often developed into experts at the practice. She must never join their dismal league.
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At birth the Devil touched my tongue.
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I give her sadness and the gift of pain, a new moon madness and a love of rain.
Dorothy Parker
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Upton Sinclair is his own King Charles' head. He cannot keep himself out of his writings, try though he may or, by this time, try though he doesn't.
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[On hearing that President Coolidge was dead:] How can you tell?
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Men seldom make passes at girls who wear glasses.
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I wanted to be cute. That's the terrible thing. I should have had more sense.
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My land is bare of chattering folk / the clouds are low along the ridges, / and sweet's the air with curly smoke / from all my burning bridges.
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All I have to be thankful for in this world is that I was sitting down when my garter busted.
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Tonstant Weader fwowed up.
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Sorrow is tranquility remembered in emotion.
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Women and elephants never forget.
Dorothy Parker
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Now to me, Edith looks like something that would eat her young.
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[At the reception following her remarriage to Alan Campbell:] People who haven't talked to each other in years are on speaking terms again today - including the bride and groom.
Dorothy Parker