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The first thing I do in the morning is brush my teeth and sharpen my tongue.
Dorothy Parker
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Dorothy Parker
Age: 73 †
Born: 1893
Born: August 22
Died: 1967
Died: June 7
Columnist
Journalist
Literary Critic
Poet
Screenwriter
Songwriter
Writer
West End
Monmouth County
New Jersey
Dorothy Rothschild
Dot Rothschild
Dottie Rothschild
Teeth
Tongue
Morning
Firsts
First
Sharpening
Thing
Sharpen
Brush
Brushes
More quotes by Dorothy Parker
If I don't drive around the park, I'm pretty sure to make my mark. If I'm in bed each night by ten, I may get back my looks again. If I abstain from fun and such, I'll probably amount to much But I shall stay the way I am, Because I do not give a damn.
Dorothy Parker
I was always sweet, at first. Oh, it's so easy to be sweet to people before you love them.
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Be you wise and never sad, You will get your lovely lad. Never serious be, nor true, And your wish will come to you-- And if that makes you happy, kid, You'll be the first it ever did.
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There are times when images blow to fluff, and comparisons stiffen and shrivel.
Dorothy Parker
Money cannot buy health, but I'd settle for a diamond-studded wheelchair.
Dorothy Parker
Well, there are always those who cannot distinguish between glitter and glamour . . . the glamour of Isadora Duncan came from her great, torn, bewildered, foolhardy soul.
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I know this will come as a shock to you, Mr. Goldwyn, but in all history, which has held billions and billions of human beings, not a single one ever had a happy ending.
Dorothy Parker
all men are the same age.
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Of Orson Welles: It's like meeting God without dying.
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Eternity is a ham and two people.
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At birth the Devil touched my tongue.
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Innocence is a desirable thing, a dainty thing, an appealing thing, in its place but carried too far, it is merely ridiculous.
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Out in Hollywood, where the streets are paved with Goldwyn.
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She can sit up and beg, and she can give her paw — I don't say she will, but she can.
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People ought to be one of two things, young or dead.
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There was always something immensely comic to her in the thought of living elsewhere than New York. She could not regard as serious proposals that she share a western residence.
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I like to have a martini/Two at the very most/After three I'm under the table/After four I'm under my host.
Dorothy Parker
They sicken of the calm who know the storm.
Dorothy Parker
Upton Sinclair is his own King Charles' head. He cannot keep himself out of his writings, try though he may or, by this time, try though he doesn't.
Dorothy Parker
I misremember who first was cruel enough to nurture the cocktail party into life. But perhaps it would be not too much to say, in fact it would be not enough to say, that it was not worth the trouble.
Dorothy Parker