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You can lead a horticulture, but you can't make her think.

Dorothy Parker

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Dorothy Parker
Age: 73 †
Born: 1893
Born: August 22
Died: 1967
Died: June 7
Columnist
Journalist
Literary Critic
Poet
Screenwriter
Songwriter
Writer
West End
Monmouth County
New Jersey
Dorothy Rothschild
Dot Rothschild
Dottie Rothschild
Make
Think
Algonquins
Thinking
Horticulture
Pun
Gardening
Lead
Funny
Women

More quotes by Dorothy Parker

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tomorrow's gone-we'll have tonight!
Dorothy Parker
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We were all imitative. We all wandered in after Miss Edna St. Vincent Millay. We were all being dashing and gallant, declaring we weren't virgins, whether we were or not.
Dorothy Parker
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[On hearing that President Coolidge was dead:] How can you tell?
Dorothy Parker
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Why, after all, should readers never be harrowed? Surely there is enough happiness in life without having to go to books for it.
Dorothy Parker
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Hollywood money isn't money. It's congealed snow, melts in your hand, and there you are.
Dorothy Parker
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Art is a form of catharsis emotional release, purging, cleansing, purifying.
Dorothy Parker
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The affair between Margot Asquith and Margot Asquith will live as one of the prettiest love stories in all literature.
Dorothy Parker
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Now I know the things I know, and I do the things I do and if you do not like me so, to hell, my love, with you!
Dorothy Parker
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Be you wise and never sad, You will get your lovely lad. Never serious be, nor true, And your wish will come to you-- And if that makes you happy, kid, You'll be the first it ever did.
Dorothy Parker
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[On Katharine Hepburn's stage performance:] She ran the whole gamut of emotions, from A to B.
Dorothy Parker
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London is satisfied, Paris is resigned, but New York is always hopeful. Always it believes that something good is about to come off, and it must hurry to meet it.
Dorothy Parker
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Mrs. Ewing was a short woman who accepted the obligation borne by so many short women to make up in vivacity what they lack in number of inches from the ground.
Dorothy Parker
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Prince or commoner, tenor or bass, Painter or plumber or never-do-well, Do me a favor and shut your face - Poets alone should kiss and tell.
Dorothy Parker
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Los Angeles: Seventy-two suburbs in search of a city.
Dorothy Parker
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This is me apologizing. I am a fool, a bird-brain, a liar and a horse-thief. I wouldn't touch a superlative again with an umbrella.
Dorothy Parker
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There must be courage there must be no awe. There must be criticism, for humor, to my mind, is encapsulated in criticism. There must be a disciplined eye and a wild mind...There must be a magnificent disregard of your reader, for if he cannot follow you, there is nothing you can do about it.
Dorothy Parker
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Newton's Fourth Law: Every action has an equal and opposite satisfaction.
Dorothy Parker
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I wish, I wish I were a poisonous bacterium.
Dorothy Parker
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Once, when I was young and true. Someone left me sad - Broke my brittle heart in two And that is very bad. Love is for unlucky folk, Love is but a curse. Once there was a heart I broke And that, I think, is worse.
Dorothy Parker
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The first thing I do in the morning is brush my teeth and sharpen my tongue.
Dorothy Parker