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I pissed on the man who called me a dog. Why was he so surprised?

Diogenes

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Diogenes
Philosopher
Sinope
Diogenes the Cynic
Diogenes
Called
Men
Pissed
Surprised
Dog

More quotes by Diogenes

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I am not an Athenian or a Greek, but a citizen of the world.
Diogenes
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On being asked by someone how he could become famous, Diogenes responded: 'By worrying as little as possible about fame
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No man is hurt but by himself. ...Literally by how he interprets what happens to him. If he focusses on how it could have been better, he will be hurt. If he focusses on how it could have been worse, he will be happy. The same is true for women too.
Diogenes
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One original thought is worth a thousand mindless quotings
Diogenes
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Aren't you ashamed, you who walk backward along the whole path of existence, and blame me for walking backward along the path of the promenade?
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It is not that I am mad, it is only that my head is different from yours.
Diogenes
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The Sun visits cesspools without being defiled.
Diogenes
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To Xeniades, who had purchased Diogenes at the slave market, he said, Come, see that you obey orders.
Diogenes
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Discourse on virtue and they pass by in droves. Whistle and dance the shimmy, and you've got an audience.
Diogenes
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When asked what was the proper time for supper: If you are a rich man, whenever you please and if you are a poor man, whenever you can.
Diogenes
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He once begged alms of a statue, and, when asked why he did so, replied, To get practice in being refused.
Diogenes
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When some one boasted that at the Pythian games he had vanquished men, Diogenes replied, Nay, I defeat men, you defeat slaves.
Diogenes
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One day, observing a child drinking out of his hands, he cast away the cup from his wallet with the words, A child has beaten me in plainness of living.
Diogenes
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The only way to gall and fret effectively is for yourself to be a good and honest man.
Diogenes
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Even if I am but a pretender to wisdom, that in itself is philosophy.
Diogenes
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Fools! You think of god as a sentient being. God is the word used to represent a force. This force created nothing, it just helps things along. It does not answer prayers, although it may make you think of a way to solve a problem. It has the power to influence you, but not decide for you.
Diogenes
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Aristotle dines when it seems good to King Philip, but Diogenes when he himself pleases.
Diogenes
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He lit a lamp in broad daylight and said, as he went about, I am looking for a human.
Diogenes
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Protagoras asserted that there are two sides to every question, exactly opposite to each other.
Diogenes
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We have two ears and one tongue so that we would listen more and talk less.
Diogenes