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[My mother] once cooked a ham and later found it in my father's shirt drawer. I am not kidding.
Dick Van Dyke
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Dick Van Dyke
Age: 99
Born: 1925
Born: December 13
Actor
Comedian
Dancer
Film Actor
Film Producer
Musician
Screenwriter
Singer
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Television Producer
Voice Actor
West Plains
Missouri
Richard Wayne Van Dyke
Mother
Cooked
Drawers
Kidding
Shirt
Shirts
Later
Father
Ham
Found
Drawer
More quotes by Dick Van Dyke
I've got plenty of arthritis. But if you keep moving, it won't bother you that much. That's why old guys stiffen up. They forget they have to get out of their chairs and do something. You let the moss grow over, it's your own fault.
Dick Van Dyke
People think I'm talking like I'm in perfect health, but I have all the infirmities for my age. I have arthritis and all those things. But if you keep moving, that won't bother you.
Dick Van Dyke
Women will never be as successful as men because they have no wives to advise them.
Dick Van Dyke
I'm really in retirement. My career is over. I'm just playing now and having a great time. I like to keep busy, and I'm doing what's fun for me.
Dick Van Dyke
Moses probably danced a little, right? You don't part the Red Sea without having some moves.
Dick Van Dyke
We should never judge a day by its weather.
Dick Van Dyke
As wonderful as they were, my parents didn't teach me anything about self-discipline, concentration, patience, or focus. If I hadn't had a family myself, I probably never would've done anything. Marriage taught me responsibility.
Dick Van Dyke
You can spread jelly on the peanut butter but you can't spread peanut butter on the jelly.
Dick Van Dyke
My kids are so much better parent than I was.
Dick Van Dyke
My son Barry, of course, has been on from the beginning. And his son Shane is playing now a med student regularly on the show. And at one point or another, I've had all four of his kids on the show.
Dick Van Dyke
I think, the 'Van Dyke Show' and 'Mary Poppins' are two of the best periods of my life. I had so much fun, I didn't want it to end.
Dick Van Dyke
I hear music and my feet just start moving.
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I'm the anti-Quentin Tarantino.
Dick Van Dyke
I have also heard and read various accounts of why they [Sheldon Leonard and Carl Reiner] liked me. My favorites? I wasn't too good-looking, I walked a little funny, and I was basically kind of average and ordinary. I guess my lack of perfection turned out to be a winning hand. Let that be a lesson for future generations.
Dick Van Dyke
Jon Stewart kills me. I love him. And Bill Maher. He does an hour on HBO. But entirely political. It is awfully rough, but he does make me laugh.
Dick Van Dyke
When I auditioned for 'Bye Bye Birdie' on Broadway, Gower Champion said, 'You've got the job!' I said, 'Mr. Champion, I can't dance.' He said, 'We'll teach you what you need to know.'
Dick Van Dyke
The secret to keeping moving is keeping moving.
Dick Van Dyke
I think the saddest moment in my life just happened two months ago. My old nightclub partner passed away, Phil Erickson down in Atlanta. He - I owe him everything. He put me in the business and taught me about everything I know.
Dick Van Dyke
It means you never know what's going to happen,' I said. 'You do your best, then take your chances. Everything else is beyond our control.
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I think both of those: the subject matter, pop culture... the talent, I don't think... there's no Jim Belushi in Saturday Night Live, for me. And probably, you know, possibly the material. They've done everything over the years.
Dick Van Dyke