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When I lost my rifle, the Army charged me 85 dollars. That is why in the Navy the Captain goes down with the ship.
Dick Gregory
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Dick Gregory
Age: 84 †
Born: 1932
Born: October 12
Died: 2017
Died: August 19
Athletics Competitor
Autobiographer
Comedian
Entrepreneur
Politician
Social Activist
Social Critic
Writer
St. Louis
Missouri
Richard Claxton Gregory
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Captain
Responsibility
Captains
Funny
Navy
Lost
Ship
Rifle
Ships
Naval
Dollars
Rifles
Army
Charged
Military
Commanders
More quotes by Dick Gregory
In the South they don't mind how close I get, so long as I don't get too big. In the North they don't mind how big I get, so long as I don't get too close.
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Revolution ain't nothing but an extent of evolution Evolution is a fact of nature. So when old folks tell me that they don't understand hip hop and the music is too loud, well I guess it means you're not supposed to be in there.
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Because you make me laugh don't make you a comic. A comedian is a person who, that's how they make their living.
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You got to die of something because if you die of nothing, they won't pay your insurance.
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Life isn't a race. It's a relay.
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Audiences feel no hatred from me. Because I'm not bitter.
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The world is fed by greed.
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Once I realised the value of making people laugh, I got very good at it. Fast.
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Let me tell you, never before in the history of this planet has anybody made the progress that African-Americans have made in a 30-year period, in spite of many black folks and white folks lying to one another.
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Love is very dangerous if you just have love and don't have the ability to be lovable.
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Black Americans are the only people in history who are for education instead of liberation. George Washington wasn't beating up on British for the right to open a college! The line isn't Give me education or give me death.
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I chose to be an agitator. And there's one interesting thing about being an agitator - and I tell people - the next time you put your underwear in the washing machine, take the agitator out, and all you're going to end up with is some dirty, wet drawers.
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I wouldn't mind paying taxes... if I knew they were going to a friendly country
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I consider myself always a humorist. And I think anybody who tells jokes or makes people laugh is humor.
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If you can justify killing to eat meat, you can justify the conditions of the ghetto. I cannot justify either one.
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America has the mightiest military on the planet, and they didn't get there with entertainers.
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I believe young voters will either vote for Obama or not vote at all. So the problem is not Obama the problem is the system. If you think about how mess up this country is most folk really don’t have choices.
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In most places in the country, voting is looked upon as a right and a duty, but in Chicago it's a sport.
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Just being a Negro doesn't qualify you to understand the race situation any more than being sick makes you an expert on medicine.
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Nature is not affected by finance. If someone offered you ten thousand dollars to let them touch your eyeball without blinking, you would never collect the money. At the very last moment, Nature would force you to blink your eye. Nature will protect her own.
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