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Obviously those who burn to be professional jesters mean that they want to be successful comedians. And those are always an elite, microscopic portion of the population. But oh, how they try.

Dick Cavett

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Dick Cavett
Age: 87
Born: 1936
Born: November 19
Actor
Artistic Gymnast
Host
Screenwriter
Television Presenter
Writer
Gibbon
Nebraska
Richard Alva Cavett
Professional
Elitism
Obviously
Comedians
Population
Elite
Successful
Portion
Mean
Elites
Trying
Portions
Jesters
Always
Burn
Microscopic
Comedian
Jester

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I am always shocked that there are still a handful of defenders of the dubious practice of abstinence, surely the worst idea since chocolate-covered ants.
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Anyone working in the media can tell you that there seems to be an always-ready-to-explode segment of the populace for whom offense is a fate worse than anything imaginable. You'd think offense is one of the most calamitous things that could happen to a human being right up there with the loss of a limb, or just missing a parking space.
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Years have passed since I have set foot in a comedy club. If the comic is doing badly it's painful, and if the comic is doing brilliantly, it's extremely painful.
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Depression - it falls into that small category of things like combat that, if you haven't been in it, you can say you can imagine it all you like. But it's truly different.
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The information superhighway? That sounds like a place that's long and boring and kills 50,000 people a year.
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Home schooling as an idea is on a par with home dentistry.
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Why anyone, by dying, should thereby be declared beyond criticism, innocent of wrongdoing, suddenly filled with virtue and above reproach escapes me.
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It's a tribute to the human brain that anyone is able to function out there on television in a talk situation that is entirely artificial.
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The trick to writing for people is, you have to be able to turn them on in your head. And know how they'd word something or how they'd inflect it.
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I have a feeling that about 90% of my life has been shaped by my voice, both as an embarrassment and as an advantage. There was always the terrible incongruity of this deep voice barreling out of this little body. Somewhere in the back of my mind I was aware that it was ludicrous, that it took on an importance that wasn't really there.
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Every writer knows that unless you were born gifted with either supreme confidence or outsize ego, handing in your work holds, in some cases, admitted terror. If that's too strong, at least fairly high anxiety.
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Perhaps the saddest irony of depression is that suicide happens when the patient gets a little better and can again function sufficiently.
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I live a sensible life. You know, I don't take on too much.
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The emotions in all true anxiety dreams are next to unbearable.
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History is not reassuring on the subject of the longevity of seemingly lasting great nations, is it?
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Nobody is going to try to confiscate guns, although some Web sites know better: President Obama, they are certain, wants to.
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There should be three days a week when no one is allowed to say: 'What's your sign?' Violators would have their copies of Kahlil Gibran confiscated.
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Coming up through the ranks of any calling can be rough, but that battered soul who survives the early years of courting the comic muse comes close to knowing what only the soldier knows: What combat is like.
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If (O.J. Simpson) is acquitted, I will renounce my citizenship. And if I converse with him at a cocktail party, I will say, 'Well, there are so many people here who haven't murdered anyone. I think I'll go talk to them.' I'll also riot.
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If you have a relative who's lost interest in everything and doesn't get out of bed, who doesn't care for things they used to, can't imagine anything that would give them any pleasure, don't fool around with it get therapy, get help, get medication if that's right for you, or talk therapy, or something.
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