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I'm sophisticated, charming, suave, and debonair, Professor. But I have never claimed to be civilized.

Derek Landy

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Derek Landy
Age: 50
Born: 1974
Born: October 23
Author
Screenwriter
Writer
Professor
Professors
Charming
Sophisticated
Civilized
Never
Debonair
Suave
Claimed

More quotes by Derek Landy

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Just leave her alone. You're annoying her.' 'I'm not annoying her. She doesn't even know how to be annoyed. She's, what, a week old?' 'She's three months.' 'She's three months in our years, but what is she in baby years?
Derek Landy
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He does this on purpose, Stephanie's mother said as they sat in the car, seat belts on and ready to go. They watched him appear at the front door, shrug into his jacket, tuck in his shirt, go to step out, and then pause. He looks like he's about to sneeze, Stephanie remarked.
Derek Landy
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Suddenly Saracen Rue looked old and tired, and Skulduggery Pleasant came into focus as what he really was – a genius, a killer, a tortured soul, and the only true dead man among them.
Derek Landy
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Oh my god you're thicker than you look
Derek Landy
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I find it rude to laugh at a man with a sword.
Derek Landy
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I try not to underestimate my opponents, no matter how ridiculous their beards.
Derek Landy
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Emergency Valve Regulators, she repeated. So you do know what your doing? Not really, he said yanking another wire. 'I made up that term to keep you happy. I'm just pulling all the red wires because they're the pretty ones.
Derek Landy
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Is that it?” “No. That’s a wall.” “It could be disguised.” “You’re not very good at looking for things, are you?” “I’m good at looking for walls. Look, I found another one.
Derek Landy
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What is it?' Stephanie whispered. 'That, my dear Valkyrie, is what we call a monster.' She looked at Skulduggery. 'You don't know what it is, do you?' 'I told you what it is, it's a horrible monster. Now shut up before it comes over here and eats us.
Derek Landy
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Doors are for people with no imagination.
Derek Landy
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She’s not… She’s not datin’ the skeleton, is she? How would that be even possible, let alone… nice? He’s got no skin, or lips, or… or nothin’.
Derek Landy
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I know how easy it is to be swept away by stories, by things you wish were real.
Derek Landy
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That's a shame. I'm sure somebody, somewhere, cares.
Derek Landy
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We didn't die,' she said. Of course not. I'm too clever to die, and you're too pretty.' I am pretty,' Valkryie said, managing a grin.
Derek Landy
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You're not stealing anything, you're not breaking anything, so I'd guess you're Stephanie.
Derek Landy
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You have no idea about presents or what they mean. The last present you gave me was a stick.” “You wanted a weapon.” “It was a stick.” “It had a bow on it.” “It was a stick.” “I thought you liked the stick. You laughed.
Derek Landy
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You've done what? I know, he said. You're impressed. You send me out for bread and I come back with a boy. Well, not literally. That would be weird. Even for me.
Derek Landy
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I cross the place where my heart used to be and hope to be even deader than I am now.
Derek Landy
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Are you taking my hat hostage?
Derek Landy
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Gordon Edgley's sudden death came as a shock to everyone - not least himself. One moment he was in his study, seven words into the twenty-fifth sentence of the final chapter of his new book, And the Darkness Rained upon Them, and the next he was dead. A tragic loss, his mind echoed numbly as he slipped away.
Derek Landy