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I'm sophisticated, charming, suave, and debonair, Professor. But I have never claimed to be civilized.

Derek Landy

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Derek Landy
Age: 50
Born: 1974
Born: October 23
Author
Screenwriter
Writer
Professors
Charming
Sophisticated
Civilized
Never
Debonair
Suave
Claimed
Professor

More quotes by Derek Landy

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I swear, talking to you is like talking to a really good-looking and mildly stupid brick wall.
Derek Landy
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Valkyrie: “You are such a moron.” Skulduggery: “Don't be jealous of my genius.
Derek Landy
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You're not stealing anything, you're not breaking anything, so I'd guess you're Stephanie.
Derek Landy
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I have sought you out to cure me.' 'To cure you of what?' 'Of this cursed affliction.' 'I cannot cure stupidity.' Scapegrace frowned.
Derek Landy
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They say sarcasm is the lowest form of wit, Valkyrie said. China glanced at her. They've obviously never met me.
Derek Landy
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Enjoy that?' Tanith said with a little grin. Valkryie grinned back, her eyes bright. 'I keep telling Skulduggery he should get a bike.' What does he say?' He says people who wear leathers, like you, should ride motorbikes. People who wear exquisite suits, like him, should drive Bentleys.
Derek Landy
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She wants to be polite and not hurt your feelings, so she's not going to laugh right now. But inside, inside she's laughing.
Derek Landy
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Found something?...No, sorry. I thought I had, but, no, it turned out to be, uh… more floor.
Derek Landy
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Are you taking my hat hostage?
Derek Landy
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Guild doesn't like me. That's true. He doesn't like you, ether. That is mystifying.
Derek Landy
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We didn't die,' she said. Of course not. I'm too clever to die, and you're too pretty.' I am pretty,' Valkryie said, managing a grin.
Derek Landy
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Every human being who has ever lived has the same potential in them for good and evil. Mortal or sorcerer, it doesn't matter. Power has a way of bringing out the worst in people. Mevolent. Serpine. Hitler. Lord Vile. Darquesse. We're all the same. You just put me on a list with Hitler. You're going to start sulking again, aren't you?
Derek Landy
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The lies we tell other people are nothing to the lies we tell ourselves.
Derek Landy
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You accused me of murder. Do you make a habit of bringing schoolgirls into an interview room with murder suspects?' He waved his hand. 'Oh, I was only joking about that. I don't really think you murdered someone. Unless you did, in which case I reserve the right to say I knew it all along.
Derek Landy
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Are you going to shoot me?' Vengeous sneered. 'I wouldn't be surprised. What would a thing like you know about honor? Only a heathen would bring a gun to a sword fight.' And only a moron would bring a sword to a gunfight.
Derek Landy
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The problem with living so long is that we get used to it. We watch the mortals age and wither and die around us, watch the world change and decay...but no matter the hardship or the pain or the sorrow we suffer, we choose to continue living. Out of sheer habit, I think.
Derek Landy
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Stairs, Valkyrie said, disappointed. Not just ordinary stairs, Skulduggery told her as he led the way down. Magic stairs. Really? Oh, yes. She followed him into the darkness. How are they magic? They just are. In what way? In a magicky way. She glared at the back of his head. They aren't magic at all, are they?
Derek Landy
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And then the Necromancers pulled out their sub-atomic machine guns.
Derek Landy
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Don't be jealous of my genius.
Derek Landy
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That's ridiculous. The only point in having enemies is so you can defeat them, kill them, brush them aside. Or give them a chance to redeem themselves.
Derek Landy