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I'm sophisticated, charming, suave, and debonair, Professor. But I have never claimed to be civilized.

Derek Landy

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Derek Landy
Age: 50
Born: 1974
Born: October 23
Author
Screenwriter
Writer
Professor
Professors
Charming
Sophisticated
Civilized
Never
Debonair
Suave
Claimed

More quotes by Derek Landy

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tanith: have you called the police? fergus: they, uh, they said theyd call by this afternoon. tanith: tell them not to bother... im his doctor. beryl: what kind of doctor dresses in brown leather? tanith: the kind that looks good init
Derek Landy
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I kill a sofa for you and you go and sit in a chair?” Skulduggery asked. “I don’t think you appreciate the sacrifice that has been made for you.
Derek Landy
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I'm fairly certain. I could be some ghastly hallucination, a figment of my own imagination
Derek Landy
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Just because an apple falls one hundred times out of a hundred does not mean it will fall on the hundred and first.
Derek Landy
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I try not to underestimate my opponents, no matter how ridiculous their beards.
Derek Landy
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Have you killed anyone?” she asked quickly. “What? Did you miss what I said, about turning murder into an art form?” “But you haven’t actually killed anyone yet, have you? I read your file.” He glowered. “Technically, yeah, all right, maybe I haven’t
Derek Landy
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We're not retreating, we're advancing in reverse.' --Skulduggery Pleasant
Derek Landy
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Well, to put it delicately, she has the power to suck out people's brains.
Derek Landy
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What? she asked again. He pointed ahead of them. See that? What, the snow? Beyond that. More snow? Stop looking at the snow.
Derek Landy
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Then I reckon we got ourselves a good old-fashioned standoff. ... Nobody moved, or said anything, for the next few moments. Old-fashioned standoffs are mighty borin
Derek Landy
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I'm placing you under arrest for murder, conspiracy to commit murder and, I don't know, possibly littering.
Derek Landy
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It's not that I want you to go, it's just that I don't want you to stay. - China Sorrows -
Derek Landy
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That was a good day for me, Skulduggery said. I didn't have to hit anyone. I didn't have to shoot anyone. I just sat around and talked to my good friend and partner, Valkyrie Cain.
Derek Landy
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If there is one regret that I have had in my life, it is that I never fathered any children. There are times, when I look at what Fergus and Beryl have produced, when I consider myself fortunate, but there are also times when it breaks my heart.
Derek Landy
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I'm sorry,' said the shopkeeper. 'I can't understand your ridiculous accent.' 'My accent?' 'It is quite silly.' 'So you can't understand me?' 'Not a word.' 'Then how did you understand that?' 'I didn't.' ''You didn't understand what I just said?' 'That's right.' 'You understood that, though.' 'Not at all.' The American glowered.
Derek Landy
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This isn't funny. She was almost killed.' 'I'm aware. You're waiting to see if I will get angry.' 'I already know you're angry. You're sitting very still and you're talking very quietly. You're getting ready to kill someone.' 'I just need a name.
Derek Landy
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We don’t need a cure,” the other zombie said. “That’s right,” Scapegrace nodded. “We’re happy the way we are.” “Happy with the power,” Scapegrace clarified. “Very happy, just the two of us, and there’s nothing wrong with us either. It’s very natural in fact. Nothing to be ashamed of—” “Thrasher,” said Scapegrace, “shut up.
Derek Landy
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It’s fairly standard. Also, I’m fourteen. Also, your beard’s stupid.” “Isn’t this fun?” Skulduggery said brightly. “The three of us getting along so well.
Derek Landy
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Sometimes it's not what you say, Valkyrie, it's just the fact that you're saying it.
Derek Landy
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Are you hurt? Are you injured? / No, just a bruise or two. I'm fine, really. You don't have to worry about me. / Stephanie, you jumped off a building. / Yes, but the branches broke my fall. Every one of them. / And how were the branches? / A lot unlike pillows.
Derek Landy