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The Baron, unfortunately, turns it all the way up to eleven. Seriously? Because, you know, that's one more evil

Derek Landy

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Derek Landy
Age: 50
Born: 1974
Born: October 23
Author
Screenwriter
Writer
Baron
Eleven
Unfortunately
Seriously
Turns
Evil
Way

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Are you sulking?” “Me? No. I don’t sulk.” “You sound like you’re sulking.” “I’m just waiting for the violent urges to subside.
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Here she is,” her mum said, cooing at the baby, “my special girl.” “Oh, cheers,” Valkyrie said, rolling her eyes.
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I try not to underestimate my opponents, no matter how ridiculous their beards.
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This is your one chance. Tell me where the key is. Okay. Serpine raised an eyebrow. Really? No, only joking. Do your worst.
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Just leave her alone. You're annoying her.' 'I'm not annoying her. She doesn't even know how to be annoyed. She's, what, a week old?' 'She's three months.' 'She's three months in our years, but what is she in baby years?
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It's not that I want you to go, it's just that I don't want you to stay. - China Sorrows -
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Doors are for people with no imagination.
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Have you killed anyone?” she asked quickly. “What? Did you miss what I said, about turning murder into an art form?” “But you haven’t actually killed anyone yet, have you? I read your file.” He glowered. “Technically, yeah, all right, maybe I haven’t
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The calm before the storm
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Desmond, don't poke the baby!'... 'I'll get you next time-' Don't threaten the baby either!'.
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Tides do what tides do – they turn.
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I'm placing you under arrest for murder, conspiracy to commit murder and, I don't know, possibly littering.
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What is it?' Stephanie whispered. 'That, my dear Valkyrie, is what we call a monster.' She looked at Skulduggery. 'You don't know what it is, do you?' 'I told you what it is, it's a horrible monster. Now shut up before it comes over here and eats us.
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But I'm really enjoying my retirement. I get to sleep in every day. I do crossword puzzles and eat cake.
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Well, to put it delicately, she has the power to suck out people's brains.
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Clarabelle laughed like she'd just heard the funniest thing ever. Of course you HOPE you won't die, Valkyrie! Who would HOPE to die? That's just SILLY! But you probably WILL die, that's what I'm saying. Don't you think so?
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The Torment turned his head to him, and frowned. Who are you? I'm... sorry? It's me, it's Vaurien. Vaurien Scapegrace. I... built the cellar for you? Oh, the Torment said. You. Why are you back? I thought you were dead. It would have been nice if you were dead
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Guild doesn't like me. That's true. He doesn't like you, ether. That is mystifying.
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I love you.' 'Yeah, well...' 'You make my heart want to beat.' 'That's nice and creepy. But I'm with Fletcher.(...) Also, these proclamations of your undying love for me are getting kind of... it's a bit much to be honest. Just hold back a little.' 'But my love for you is eternal.' 'That's exactly the kind of thing I'm talking about.
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Vengeous scowled. 'As you can see,' he said, 'you are vastly outnumbered.' I usually am.' Your situation has become quite untenable.' It usually does.' You are within moments of being swarmed by these filthy creatures of undeath and torn apart in a maelstrom of pain and fury.' Skulduggery paused. 'Okay, that's a new one on me.
Derek Landy