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You look angry, he said. You put me on hold. For a very good reason. You put me, she said very, very slowly, on hold.

Derek Landy

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Derek Landy
Age: 50
Born: 1974
Born: October 23
Author
Screenwriter
Writer
Hold
Reason
Look
Looks
Good
Slowly
Angry

More quotes by Derek Landy

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We don’t need a cure,” the other zombie said. “That’s right,” Scapegrace nodded. “We’re happy the way we are.” “Happy with the power,” Scapegrace clarified. “Very happy, just the two of us, and there’s nothing wrong with us either. It’s very natural in fact. Nothing to be ashamed of—” “Thrasher,” said Scapegrace, “shut up.
Derek Landy
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By the way, all joking aside, do I call you Ghastly or Elder Bespoke?' 'You can call me whatever you like.' Vex nodded. 'Thank you, Gladys.
Derek Landy
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She’s not… She’s not datin’ the skeleton, is she? How would that be even possible, let alone… nice? He’s got no skin, or lips, or… or nothin’.
Derek Landy
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Are you hurt? Are you injured? / No, just a bruise or two. I'm fine, really. You don't have to worry about me. / Stephanie, you jumped off a building. / Yes, but the branches broke my fall. Every one of them. / And how were the branches? / A lot unlike pillows.
Derek Landy
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I would love to have a battle of wits with you, Bison, but I doubt it would be a fair fight.' 'Shut your face.' 'Exactly my point.
Derek Landy
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The workshop door opened and Skulduggery emerged. Ryan, he said, stop leaning on my car.
Derek Landy
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Life isn't fair,' Skulduggery said. 'In my experience, death isn't so different.
Derek Landy
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That's ridiculous. The only point in having enemies is so you can defeat them, kill them, brush them aside. Or give them a chance to redeem themselves.
Derek Landy
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The problem with living so long is that we get used to it. We watch the mortals age and wither and die around us, watch the world change and decay...but no matter the hardship or the pain or the sorrow we suffer, we choose to continue living. Out of sheer habit, I think.
Derek Landy
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I find it rude to laugh at a man with a sword.
Derek Landy
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Clarabelle laughed like she'd just heard the funniest thing ever. Of course you HOPE you won't die, Valkyrie! Who would HOPE to die? That's just SILLY! But you probably WILL die, that's what I'm saying. Don't you think so?
Derek Landy
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We're here on Sanctuary business, Skulduggery tried. The man on Deadfall's right bristled, and Deadfall grinned. Hear that, Pete? They're with that Sanctuary. Hokum Pete snarled. I hate the Sanctuary. Oh, Skulduggery said. We all hate the Sanctuary. Ah. Then we're not here on Sanctuary business. I was just joking.
Derek Landy
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I am a rational man, but haven't you heard? i'm also insane. It gives me a unique perspective on things.
Derek Landy
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It’s fairly standard. Also, I’m fourteen. Also, your beard’s stupid.” “Isn’t this fun?” Skulduggery said brightly. “The three of us getting along so well.
Derek Landy
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Stephanie could see the greed seep into the watery eyes of her father’s other brother, a horrible little man called Fergus, as he nodded sadly and spoke sombrely and pocketed the silverware when he thought no one was looking
Derek Landy
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Doors are for people with no imagination.
Derek Landy
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Is he all scarred now? Magic gets rid of most physical scars, but I like to think I scarred him emotionally.
Derek Landy
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Other stories tell how I eat innocent newborns, how I’m ten feet tall, how I breathe fire and have great dragon wings. None of these are wholly accurate. I don’t have dragon wings, I don’t breathe fire, I’m only eight feet tall and I’ve never eaten a newborn that didn’t have it coming. My name is Mevolent. What’s yours?
Derek Landy
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I love stories with a happy ending,” Inspector Me said.
Derek Landy
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Here she is,” her mum said, cooing at the baby, “my special girl.” “Oh, cheers,” Valkyrie said, rolling her eyes.
Derek Landy