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But I'm really enjoying my retirement. I get to sleep in every day. I do crossword puzzles and eat cake.

Derek Landy

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Derek Landy
Age: 50
Born: 1974
Born: October 23
Author
Screenwriter
Writer
Enjoy
Crosswords
Every
Puzzles
Really
Retired
Retiring
Enjoying
Cake
Retirement
Sleep
Crossword

More quotes by Derek Landy

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The workshop door opened and Skulduggery emerged. Ryan, he said, stop leaning on my car.
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He stepped closer to her. Thank you for saving me, he said softly, and wrapped the bones of his arms around her. Valkyrie smiled and hugged him back.
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I know how easy it is to be swept away by stories, by things you wish were real.
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Desmond, don't poke the baby!'... 'I'll get you next time-' Don't threaten the baby either!'.
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They say sarcasm is the lowest form of wit, Valkyrie said. China glanced at her. They've obviously never met me.
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Found something?...No, sorry. I thought I had, but, no, it turned out to be, uh… more floor.
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Sometimes it's not what you say, Valkyrie, it's just the fact that you're saying it.
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You accused me of murder. Do you make a habit of bringing schoolgirls into an interview room with murder suspects?' He waved his hand. 'Oh, I was only joking about that. I don't really think you murdered someone. Unless you did, in which case I reserve the right to say I knew it all along.
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If there is one regret that I have had in my life, it is that I never fathered any children. There are times, when I look at what Fergus and Beryl have produced, when I consider myself fortunate, but there are also times when it breaks my heart.
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The Torment turned his head to him, and frowned. Who are you? I'm... sorry? It's me, it's Vaurien. Vaurien Scapegrace. I... built the cellar for you? Oh, the Torment said. You. Why are you back? I thought you were dead. It would have been nice if you were dead
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Love is finding someone better than you are, and holding on for dear life
Derek Landy
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I would love to have a battle of wits with you, Bison, but I doubt it would be a fair fight.' 'Shut your face.' 'Exactly my point.
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That was a good day for me, Skulduggery said. I didn't have to hit anyone. I didn't have to shoot anyone. I just sat around and talked to my good friend and partner, Valkyrie Cain.
Derek Landy
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I love you.' 'Yeah, well...' 'You make my heart want to beat.' 'That's nice and creepy. But I'm with Fletcher.(...) Also, these proclamations of your undying love for me are getting kind of... it's a bit much to be honest. Just hold back a little.' 'But my love for you is eternal.' 'That's exactly the kind of thing I'm talking about.
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Stephanie could see the greed seep into the watery eyes of her father’s other brother, a horrible little man called Fergus, as he nodded sadly and spoke sombrely and pocketed the silverware when he thought no one was looking
Derek Landy
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Valkyrie: “You are such a moron.” Skulduggery: “Don't be jealous of my genius.
Derek Landy
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You have no idea about presents or what they mean. The last present you gave me was a stick.” “You wanted a weapon.” “It was a stick.” “It had a bow on it.” “It was a stick.” “I thought you liked the stick. You laughed.
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He does this on purpose, Stephanie's mother said as they sat in the car, seat belts on and ready to go. They watched him appear at the front door, shrug into his jacket, tuck in his shirt, go to step out, and then pause. He looks like he's about to sneeze, Stephanie remarked.
Derek Landy
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We're here on Sanctuary business, Skulduggery tried. The man on Deadfall's right bristled, and Deadfall grinned. Hear that, Pete? They're with that Sanctuary. Hokum Pete snarled. I hate the Sanctuary. Oh, Skulduggery said. We all hate the Sanctuary. Ah. Then we're not here on Sanctuary business. I was just joking.
Derek Landy
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Guild doesn't like me. That's true. He doesn't like you, ether. That is mystifying.
Derek Landy