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Just leave her alone. You're annoying her.' 'I'm not annoying her. She doesn't even know how to be annoyed. She's, what, a week old?' 'She's three months.' 'She's three months in our years, but what is she in baby years?

Derek Landy

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Derek Landy
Age: 50
Born: 1974
Born: October 23
Author
Screenwriter
Writer
Even
Annoying
Years
Baby
Months
Leave
Week
Alone
Doesn
Three
Annoyed

More quotes by Derek Landy

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The Torment turned his head to him, and frowned. Who are you? I'm... sorry? It's me, it's Vaurien. Vaurien Scapegrace. I... built the cellar for you? Oh, the Torment said. You. Why are you back? I thought you were dead. It would have been nice if you were dead
Derek Landy
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Are you going to shoot me?' Vengeous sneered. 'I wouldn't be surprised. What would a thing like you know about honor? Only a heathen would bring a gun to a sword fight.' And only a moron would bring a sword to a gunfight.
Derek Landy
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And then the Necromancers pulled out their sub-atomic machine guns.
Derek Landy
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She's you, without your conscience, or your feelings. She's you without your humanity. You're saying she's a mood swing? He shrugged. Or maybe you're her mood swing. Don't even joke about that.
Derek Landy
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I find it rude to laugh at a man with a sword.
Derek Landy
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I love stories with a happy ending,” Inspector Me said.
Derek Landy
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You look angry, he said. You put me on hold. For a very good reason. You put me, she said very, very slowly, on hold.
Derek Landy
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You can only anticipate what someone is going to do if you know exactly what that someone has just done.' --Skulduggery
Derek Landy
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Oh my god you're thicker than you look
Derek Landy
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We're here on Sanctuary business, Skulduggery tried. The man on Deadfall's right bristled, and Deadfall grinned. Hear that, Pete? They're with that Sanctuary. Hokum Pete snarled. I hate the Sanctuary. Oh, Skulduggery said. We all hate the Sanctuary. Ah. Then we're not here on Sanctuary business. I was just joking.
Derek Landy
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She’s not… She’s not datin’ the skeleton, is she? How would that be even possible, let alone… nice? He’s got no skin, or lips, or… or nothin’.
Derek Landy
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You have an amazing ability to depress me sometimes, you know that? I try my best.
Derek Landy
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Found something?...No, sorry. I thought I had, but, no, it turned out to be, uh… more floor.
Derek Landy
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It’s fairly standard. Also, I’m fourteen. Also, your beard’s stupid.” “Isn’t this fun?” Skulduggery said brightly. “The three of us getting along so well.
Derek Landy
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You're not stealing anything, you're not breaking anything, so I'd guess you're Stephanie.
Derek Landy
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You've been reading Gordan's book again, haven't you? It's a white-knuckle roller-coaster ride, she mumbled.
Derek Landy
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She wants to be polite and not hurt your feelings, so she's not going to laugh right now. But inside, inside she's laughing.
Derek Landy
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Valkyrie, I hate to be the one to tell you this, but your friend is most likely dead.” “Of course he’s dead. He’s a skeleton.
Derek Landy
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It's not that I want you to go, it's just that I don't want you to stay. - China Sorrows -
Derek Landy
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The workshop door opened and Skulduggery emerged. Ryan, he said, stop leaning on my car.
Derek Landy