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I've changed after 9/11. My friends are still my friends.Bill Maher is my friend. I don't agree with a lot of what he says. And there are times I think, Oh, my God. How could he say that.

Dennis Miller

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Dennis Miller
Age: 71
Born: 1953
Born: November 3
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Producer
Journalist
Novelist
Podcaster
Radio Personality
Television Actor
Writer
Pittsburg
Pennsylvania
Dennis Michael Miller
Times
Bill
Stills
Bills
Still
Agree
Think
Friend
Thinking
Says
Changed
Friends

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To me, nature always appears more unbalanced than Gary Busey with a clogged Eustachian tube.
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The current tax code is harder to understand than Bob Dylan reading Finnegans Wake in a wind tunnel.
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Even the best psychiatrist is like a blindfolded auto mechanic poking around under your hood with a giant foam We're #1 finger.
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By and large, I think it should be a rule in the teacher employment manual that you can't go attend any event where if you took your classroom on a student field trip, they would summarily be obliterated. That should be rule No. 1.
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How do we know for sure that no two snowflakes are the same - we haven't got anybody watching.
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A third myth is that men think that women like guys who are dangerous. As a result, guys will often smoke cigarettes, drink too much, and ride a motorcycle without a helmet. The reality? Women don't like guys who are dangerous. Women want us to think that because women are trying to kill us.
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I have a nice house. And when somebody says it's a palace, I always feel like we're digging a little or something.
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Bad television is three things: a bullet train to a morally bankrupt youth, a slow spiral into an intellectual void, and of course, a complete blast to watch.
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If somebody wants to shoot up and die in front of you, more power to them. The herd has a way of thinning itself out.
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When the hell is Warren Moon going to retire? I mean, this guy is older than the cuneiform in Nebuchadnezzar's tomb.
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Hey, Cunningham - Andy Warhol called. You're at 14:55 and we're tickin' big-time here, Chachi.
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Democratic candidate John Kerry on Tuesday chose fellow Senator John Edwards to be his running mate. Asked about Edwards' lack of foreign policy experience, Kerry revealed his new campaign slogan, 'I Promise Not to Die.'
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Most Americans will let liberals and conservatives play their games because most Americans don't pay attention.
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I'm like Bush, I see the world more like checkers than chess.
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Warner had more hands in his face than an OB-GYN delivering Vishnu's triplets!
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After 7 years of marriage, I am sure of 2 things: First, never wallpaper together and second, you'll need 2 bathrooms . . . both for her. The rest is a mystery, but a mystery I love to be involved in.
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TV evangelists say they don't favor any particular denomination, but I think we've all seen their eyes light up at tens and twenties.
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The man who accused Richard Simmons of slapping him in an airport has dropped the assault charge. Dropped it! Upon hearing the news, Simmons sadly responded, You mean I'm not going to prison?
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A developer is someone who wants to build a house in the woods. An environmentalist is someone who already has a house in the woods.
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That punt was higher than Marion Berry on a fact-finding tour of Cartagena.
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