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When I said 'we', officer, I was referring to myself, the four young ladies, and, of course, the goat.

Dennis Miller

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Dennis Miller
Age: 71
Born: 1953
Born: November 3
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Producer
Journalist
Novelist
Podcaster
Radio Personality
Television Actor
Writer
Pittsburg
Pennsylvania
Dennis Michael Miller
Course
Goats
Four
Officer
Young
Referring
Ladies
Officers
Stupidity
God
Courses
Goat

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That punt was higher than Marion Berry on a fact-finding tour of Cartagena.
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Just be good and kind to your children. Not only are they the future of the world, they're the ones who can sign you into the nursing home.
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To me, nature always appears more unbalanced than Gary Busey with a clogged Eustachian tube.
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I think the American legal system sucks worse than a Celine Dion cover version of Whole Lotta Love.
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If Bill Gates is worth $30 billion then a good haircut must cost $31 billion
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Police in Washington D.C. are now using cameras to catch drivers who go through red lights. Many congressmen this week opposed the use of the red light cameras incorrectly assuming they were being used for surveillance at local brothels.
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Half the people I look who are health food addicts look sickly to me. Let's start taxing health food. Somebody force a burger down some of these people's jaw because they look a little pale and wan to me.
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Elected office holds more perks than Elvis' nightstand.
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Companionate Conservatism - Making the streets safer before people are kicked out onto them.
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The quarterback's spending so much time behind the center that he may jeopardize his right to lead a Boy Scout troop.
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Why is electricity so expensive these days? Why does it cost so much for something I can make with a balloon and my hair?
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Xenophobia doesn't benefit anybody unless you're playing high-stakes Scrabble.
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It's nice to be included in the broadcast food chain.
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Bill Gates is just a monocle and a Persian Cat away from being one of the bad guys in a James Bond movie.
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There is a chalk outline slowly being drawn around common sense and most people can't identify the victim.
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Warner had more hands in his face than an OB-GYN delivering Vishnu's triplets!
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Ray Lewis knifed through those offensive linemen like a sucker-punch switchblade slicing between the ribs of some inebriated trash-talking punk outside a sports bar.
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When the hell is Warren Moon going to retire? I mean, this guy is older than the cuneiform in Nebuchadnezzar's tomb.
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