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They have an amazing proliferation of TV channels now: The all-cartoon channel, the 24-hour-science fiction channel. Of course, to make room for these they got rid of the Literacy Channel and the What's Left of Civilization Channel.

Dennis Miller

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Dennis Miller
Age: 71
Born: 1953
Born: November 3
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Producer
Journalist
Novelist
Podcaster
Radio Personality
Television Actor
Writer
Pittsburg
Pennsylvania
Dennis Michael Miller
Science
Amazing
Left
Civilization
Make
Room
Proliferation
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Fiction
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If somebody wants to shoot up and die in front of you, more power to them. The herd has a way of thinning itself out.
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Everybody has to sell out at some point to make a living.
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The government could take away all the drugs in the world and people would spin around on their lawns until they fell down and saw God.
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I'd rather be funny than wise.
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Bill Gates is just a monocle and a Persian Cat away from being one of the bad guys in a James Bond movie.
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The American auto industry is blowing up like a 1976 Ford Pinto.
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I'm a comedian, for God's sake. Viewers shouldn't trust me. And you know what? They're hip enough to know they shouldn't trust me. I'm just doing stand-up comedy.
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A developer is someone who wants to build a house in the woods. An environmentalist is someone who already has a house in the woods.
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There will be select instances where the consumer is interested in paying for premium content. I think it will be difficult to get people to pay for something on the Internet that they can find elsewhere on the Internet for free.
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Should I really care what kind of beer frogs recommend?
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Let me use their own terminology against them. They aborted a child in the 200th trimester.
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By and large, I think it should be a rule in the teacher employment manual that you can't go attend any event where if you took your classroom on a student field trip, they would summarily be obliterated. That should be rule No. 1.
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The French are always reticent to surrender to the wishes of their friends and always more than willing to surrender to the wishes of their enemies.
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I would call the French scumbags, but that, of course, would be a disservice to bags filled with scum. I say we invade Iraq, then invade Chirac.
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President Bush gave his first-ever presidential radio address in both English and Spanish. Reaction was mixed, however, as people were trying to figure out which one was which.
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Nowadays, with history not being taught anymore in American public schools, self-esteem is taking its place.
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Xenophobia doesn't benefit anybody unless you're playing high-stakes Scrabble.
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Half the people I look who are health food addicts look sickly to me. Let's start taxing health food. Somebody force a burger down some of these people's jaw because they look a little pale and wan to me.
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Al Gore couldn't be more phony if he were a professional Al Gore impersonator
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And finally, and most importantly, the next time we go to war, don't give a specific reason for the war that the left can seize upon and later flog us with it ad nauseam, just do it. Remember, the first rule of Fight Club is that you don't talk about Fight Club.
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