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Companionate Conservatism - Making the streets safer before people are kicked out onto them.

Dennis Miller

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Dennis Miller
Age: 71
Born: 1953
Born: November 3
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Producer
Journalist
Novelist
Podcaster
Radio Personality
Television Actor
Writer
Pittsburg
Pennsylvania
Dennis Michael Miller
People
Kicked
Safer
Conservatism
Onto
Streets
Politics
Making

More quotes by Dennis Miller

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I preume there are far too many abortions performed in this country. And I also believe that at the end of the day, as much as I might disapprove, none of them are really any of my business.
Dennis Miller
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Half the people I look who are health food addicts look sickly to me. Let's start taxing health food. Somebody force a burger down some of these people's jaw because they look a little pale and wan to me.
Dennis Miller
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Parenting is the most important job on the planet next to keeping Gary Busey off the nation's highways.
Dennis Miller
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Women don't like guys who are dangerous. Women just want us to think that because women are trying to kill us.
Dennis Miller
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There is a chalk outline slowly being drawn around common sense and most people can't identify the victim.
Dennis Miller
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The government could take away all the drugs in the world and people would spin around on their lawns until they fell down and saw God.
Dennis Miller
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And quit bringing up our forefathers and saying they were civil libertarians. Our founding fathers would have never tolerated any of this crap. For God's sake, they were blowing peoples' heads off because they put a tax on their breakfast beverage. And it wasn't even coffee.
Dennis Miller
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Hey, Cunningham - Andy Warhol called. You're at 14:55 and we're tickin' big-time here, Chachi.
Dennis Miller
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Most Americans will let liberals and conservatives play their games because most Americans don't pay attention.
Dennis Miller
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Xenophobia doesn't benefit anybody unless you're playing high-stakes Scrabble.
Dennis Miller
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Ah, Feminism in the nineties, what a What is yours what is mine field.
Dennis Miller
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Jack Kerouac was cool because he had no idea he was.
Dennis Miller
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With Browns' ticket prices what they are, you just know that all those dads who brought the entire family to sit in the 'dog pound' are secretly calculating how much blood they're going to have to sell next week to put groceries on the table.
Dennis Miller
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When I said 'we', officer, I was referring to myself, the four young ladies, and, of course, the goat.
Dennis Miller
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I come from that earlier time in America when palm pilot was a nickname you recieved upon entering puberty! I was more than a palm pilot I was the palm Chuck Jager. Tom Wolfe wrote a book about me called The Right Hand Stuff. I was the only guy in my class hip enough to move to the European grip.
Dennis Miller
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I would call the French scumbags, but that, of course, would be a disservice to bags filled with scum. I say we invade Iraq, then invade Chirac.
Dennis Miller
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At some point you cannot be the kid in the glass bubble in this world. You might've heard throughout your grade school and high school years that it was a safe, nice, warm, fair, feeling place... but it can get brutal when it gets competitive. Especially when you succeed. Watch the detractors come out of the walls at that point.
Dennis Miller
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I don't need to be born again. I got it right the first time.
Dennis Miller
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And finally, and most importantly, the next time we go to war, don't give a specific reason for the war that the left can seize upon and later flog us with it ad nauseam, just do it. Remember, the first rule of Fight Club is that you don't talk about Fight Club.
Dennis Miller
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Police in Washington D.C. are now using cameras to catch drivers who go through red lights. Many congressmen this week opposed the use of the red light cameras incorrectly assuming they were being used for surveillance at local brothels.
Dennis Miller