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Al Gore couldn't be more phony if he were a professional Al Gore impersonator

Dennis Miller

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Dennis Miller
Age: 71
Born: 1953
Born: November 3
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Producer
Journalist
Novelist
Podcaster
Radio Personality
Television Actor
Writer
Pittsburg
Pennsylvania
Dennis Michael Miller
Impersonators
Phony
Gore
Als
Professional
Couldn
Politics
Impersonator

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Maybe democrats will eventually turn on Obamacare when they realize you might need a photo I.D. to participate in the program.
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I haven't seen someone so overmatched since Mike Tyson tried to recite the alphabet.
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I still feel pangs of remorse over an insidious habit I've had since I was a teenager. About three times a week, I attend estate auctions and make insulting, low-ball bids for prized heirlooms until I'm asked to leave.
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A lot of people voting for Pat Buchanan say they are doing so to send a message. Apparently that message is, 'Hey, look at me, I'm an idiot.'
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It's your living room, it's your life, go nuts. You like Home Improvement? Tape it and go over it like it's the Zapruder film.
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Ray Lewis knifed through those offensive linemen like a sucker-punch switchblade slicing between the ribs of some inebriated trash-talking punk outside a sports bar.
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I think we have to help the helpless. The clueless? I don't give a rat's ass about the clueless.
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For the foreseeable future, we're going to need oil products because I don't like the idea of hydrogen cars. I'm not sure I want to be cruising around a mall parking lot filled with a thousand mini-Hindenburgs.
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Somebody can say they don't understand why somebody drifts. But I've always found people who drift interesting, 'cause it shows me the game's not stagnant in their own head. They're thinking.
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Political Correctness is inverted McCarthyism.
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Ah, Feminism in the nineties, what a What is yours what is mine field.
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The current tax code is harder to understand than Bob Dylan reading Finnegans Wake in a wind tunnel.
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If some unemployed punk in New Jersey, can get a cassette to make love to Elle McPherson for $19.95, this virtual reality stuff is going to make crack look like Sanka.
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Nothing ruins the mood during foreplay more than the recurring image of your sixty-five-year-old homeroom teacher trying to stretch a condom over a cucumber.
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If Bill Gates is worth $30 billion then a good haircut must cost $31 billion
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I like money. It's fun to fold and stack and smell and look at. It's just plain fun to count money, and I often do it in a loud falsetto while wearing nothing but a captain's hat and a coin changer.
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Half the people I look who are health food addicts look sickly to me. Let's start taxing health food. Somebody force a burger down some of these people's jaw because they look a little pale and wan to me.
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Most Americans will let liberals and conservatives play their games because most Americans don't pay attention.
Dennis Miller
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I'm a tad paranoid. I think the person in front of me is following me the long way round.
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With Browns' ticket prices what they are, you just know that all those dads who brought the entire family to sit in the 'dog pound' are secretly calculating how much blood they're going to have to sell next week to put groceries on the table.
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