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Human beings are human beings. They say what they want, don't they? They used to say it across the fence while they were hanging wash. Now they just say it on the Internet.
Dennis Miller
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Dennis Miller
Age: 71
Born: 1953
Born: November 3
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Producer
Journalist
Novelist
Podcaster
Radio Personality
Television Actor
Writer
Pittsburg
Pennsylvania
Dennis Michael Miller
Comedy
Humanity
Wash
Funny
Fence
Used
Hanging
Human
Across
Humans
Beings
Internet
Humor
More quotes by Dennis Miller
When your mother starts using the word party as a verb about her kid, that's absolutely crazy.
Dennis Miller
Washington, DC is to lying what Wisconsin is to cheese.
Dennis Miller
Now, I don't want to get off on a rant here, but guilt is simply God's way of letting you know that you're having too good a time.
Dennis Miller
I don't need to be born again. I got it right the first time.
Dennis Miller
If you're a man and you have big tits, don't wear a tight T-shirt, okay? It confuses the children!
Dennis Miller
It's ironic that in our culture everyone's biggest complaint is about not having enough time yet nothing terrifies us more than the thought of eternity.
Dennis Miller
Somebody can say they don't understand why somebody drifts. But I've always found people who drift interesting, 'cause it shows me the game's not stagnant in their own head. They're thinking.
Dennis Miller
I'm like Bush, I see the world more like checkers than chess.
Dennis Miller
Homosexuals are entering the mainstream, because they're becoming as boring and as tedious as any other splinter group.
Dennis Miller
Ray Lewis knifed through those offensive linemen like a sucker-punch switchblade slicing between the ribs of some inebriated trash-talking punk outside a sports bar.
Dennis Miller
At some point you cannot be the kid in the glass bubble in this world. You might've heard throughout your grade school and high school years that it was a safe, nice, warm, fair, feeling place... but it can get brutal when it gets competitive. Especially when you succeed. Watch the detractors come out of the walls at that point.
Dennis Miller
The current tax code is harder to understand than Bob Dylan reading Finnegans Wake in a wind tunnel.
Dennis Miller
Listen, the weather is just like Hillary's explanation for her war vote: we just don't know, do we?
Dennis Miller
Elected office holds more perks than Elvis' nightstand.
Dennis Miller
What do you expect from a culture and a nation that exerted more of its national will fighting against Disney World and Big Macs than the Nazis?
Dennis Miller
The death penalty is becoming a way of life in this country.
Dennis Miller
We've got Nancy Pelosi. She never shuts up. It's just occasionally we have to hood her like a falcon so we can get some sleep.
Dennis Miller
Pat Buchanan is so homo-phobic, he blames global warming on the AIDS quilt.
Dennis Miller
We should fight to preserve a country where people such as Michael Moore get to miss the point as badly as he misses it. Michael Moore represents everything I detest in a human being.
Dennis Miller
With Browns' ticket prices what they are, you just know that all those dads who brought the entire family to sit in the 'dog pound' are secretly calculating how much blood they're going to have to sell next week to put groceries on the table.
Dennis Miller