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Why is electricity so expensive these days? Why does it cost so much for something I can make with a balloon and my hair?

Dennis Miller

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Dennis Miller
Age: 71
Born: 1953
Born: November 3
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Producer
Journalist
Novelist
Podcaster
Radio Personality
Television Actor
Writer
Pittsburg
Pennsylvania
Dennis Michael Miller
Doe
Much
Balloon
Something
Balloons
Make
Electricity
Expensive
Cost
Hair
Days

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That secondary provides worse coverage than a Guatemalan HMO.
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Political Correctness is inverted McCarthyism.
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It's wrong to discriminate based on skin color when there are so many other reasons not to like someone.
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There is a chalk outline slowly being drawn around common sense and most people can't identify the victim.
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Elected office holds more perks than Elvis' nightstand.
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You've got bad eating habits if you use a grocery cart in 7-Eleven.
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Parenting is the easiest job to get - you just have to screw up once and it's yours.
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America may be the best country in the world, but that's kind of like being the valedictorian of summer school.
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I went to the UN and even the guidebook was spineless.
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Liberals should not overplay this weapons of mass destruction card, because you want me to tell you the truth? Most of us are not going to care if they don't find these weapons of mass destruction. It's enough for a lot of us to see those kids smiling on that street again.
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I'm one of the more pessimistic cats on the planet. I make Van Gogh look like a rodeo clown.
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Homosexuals are entering the mainstream, because they're becoming as boring and as tedious as any other splinter group.
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Listen, the weather is just like Hillary's explanation for her war vote: we just don't know, do we?
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A third myth is that men think that women like guys who are dangerous. As a result, guys will often smoke cigarettes, drink too much, and ride a motorcycle without a helmet. The reality? Women don't like guys who are dangerous. Women want us to think that because women are trying to kill us.
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How many of those dead animals you see on the highway are suicides?
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For the foreseeable future, we're going to need oil products because I don't like the idea of hydrogen cars. I'm not sure I want to be cruising around a mall parking lot filled with a thousand mini-Hindenburgs.
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Martha Stewart denied allegations that she had been given inside information to sell 4,000 shares of a stock in a biotech firm. Stewart then showed her audience how to make a festive, quick-burning yule log out of freshly-shredded financial documents.
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Parenting is the most important job on the planet next to keeping Gary Busey off the nation's highways.
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I think abortion's wrong, but it's none of my business to tell somebody what's wrong, he said. So I'm pro-choice. I want to keep my nose out of other people's personal business. I guess I fall into conservative when it comes to protecting the United States in a world where a lot of people hate the United States.
Dennis Miller
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Now, I don't want to get off on a rant here, but guilt is simply God's way of letting you know that you're having too good a time.
Dennis Miller