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I'm gonna get one of those tracheotomies, so I can smoke two cigarettes at the same time! I'm gonna get nine tracheotomies, all around my neck, I'll be Tracheotomy Man! He can smoke a pack at a time, he's Tracheotomy Man!
Denis Leary
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Denis Leary
Age: 67
Born: 1957
Born: August 18
Actor
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Showrunner
Television Actor
Television Producer
University Teacher
Voice Actor
Worcester
Massachusetts
Denis Colin Leary
Two
Cigarette
Around
Neck
Men
Necks
Time
Smoke
Nine
Gonna
Cigarettes
Humor
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Funny
Packs
More quotes by Denis Leary
You just can't win. Men have very recent land mines in their heads. Women have recorded conversations and photographs in their heads from 15 years ago.
Denis Leary
Is it possible to get a cup of coffee-flavored coffee anymore in this country? What happened with coffee? Did I miss a meeting? They have every other flavor but coffee-flavored coffee. They have mochaccino, frappaccino, cappuccino, al pacino...Coffee doesn't need a menu, it needs a cup.
Denis Leary
Having dealt with a lot of real firefighters, I know there are a lot of guys who, for lack of a better term, become addicted to the grief because it has kept them connected to these guys that they felt responsible for having lost.
Denis Leary
Everybody's vying for people's attention in terms of eyeballs, earholes, and dollars.
Denis Leary
Everyone's got skeletons in their closet, and I've got a million in mine, believe me. I tested the envelope I pushed it. Whenever somebody in authority told me not to do something, I did it just to find out why they said not to do it.
Denis Leary
That's why I'm glad Jesus died when he did. Because if he lived to be 40, he would have ended up like Elvis. He was famous already at that point. If he lived to be 40, he'd be walking around Jerusalem with a big fat beer gut and black side burns going, Damn, I'm the son of God. Give me a cheeseburger and french fries right now.
Denis Leary
I'm sick and tired of our generation being called the TV generation. What do you expect? We watched Lee Harvey Oswald get his brains blown out all over. How could we change the channel after that?
Denis Leary
My dad was very much a John Wayne kind of guy, but he was also a great guy, great sense of humor, a real dedicated dad. I don't think he ever missed a hockey game I was in.
Denis Leary
Kids are incredibly expensive. But it pays off later when they are better educated, bigger, and better-looking than you. And find you incessantly boring and uncool.
Denis Leary
My brother and I tortured my mother growing up.
Denis Leary
Where I grew up, the basketball courts were rarely used.
Denis Leary
I've only done two other TV shows [instead of Sex&Drugs&Rock&Roll], one was Rescue Me and the other was a show called The Job, which was at ABC and only on for two seasons.
Denis Leary
I'm pretty much a chocolate guy. I'm up for any type of chocolate. Any chocolate.
Denis Leary
I guess you get pigeon-holed in Hollywood, but I'm ok with that because I've been able to do a lot. I started in the theater, then I went to stand-up comedy, and then when I went into the movies to do comedy and drama and big movies and small movies.
Denis Leary
It's hard to have a film and television career and do music work at the same time.
Denis Leary
I have good kids, I love my kids. I try to bring them up the right way, not spanking them. I find that I don't have to spank them. I find that waving the gun around pretty much gets the same job done!
Denis Leary
I think it's a shame when you come across young actors and musicians who haven't had the time to learn their craft. It doesn't matter if it's acting or music, you really have to learn how to do it from the bottom up because unless you have a great work ethic... fame is a terrible thing to have.
Denis Leary
Crisis doesn't create character it reveals it.
Denis Leary
What's politically correct a lot of times is not funny.
Denis Leary
Science fiction was never my thing. I have no interest in it. So I don't think I could successfully pull off being on a project like that without really losing my mind.
Denis Leary