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I'm really good at laundry, and I have no problem cleaning the kitchen.

Denis Leary

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Denis Leary
Age: 67
Born: 1957
Born: August 18
Actor
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Showrunner
Television Actor
Television Producer
University Teacher
Voice Actor
Worcester
Massachusetts
Denis Colin Leary
Good
Laundry
Cleaning
Kitchen
Problem
Really

More quotes by Denis Leary

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Most people think, Life sucks, and then you die. I disagree. I think life sucks. Then you get cancer. Then you go into chemotherapy. You lose all your hair, you feel bad about yourself. Then all of the sudden the cancer goes into remission, and then all of the sudden you have a stroke. You can't move your right side. And then, maybe, you die.
Denis Leary
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Loud, stupid and overeating will suffice as long as we also have the funny, the fierce and the intellectual
Denis Leary
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When I was doing standup, I always wanted to get out of the standup world and take it back into the theatrical world, like with No Cure For Cancer.
Denis Leary
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I'm one of the people that when I wake up I have to do what I do. It's not like I want to do it. I kind of have to do it.
Denis Leary
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Worrying about tomorrow is the best way to screw up today.
Denis Leary
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The only difference between kids and jungle animals is pants. Kids wear them. Jungle animals don't.
Denis Leary
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I like to give the actors freedom to take what we have on the page and improve on it. And they do that quite a bit.
Denis Leary
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There's no way around it, drama is very difficult to shoot. It's very heavy and something that you carry with you for the course of the day.
Denis Leary
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I love to smoke. I love to eat red meat. I'll only eat red meat that comes from cows who smoke, ok!? Special cows they grow in Virginia with voice boxes in their necks. Moo
Denis Leary
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This is the most exciting place in the world to live. Oh yeah! There are so many ways to die in New York City! Race riots, drive by shootings, subway crashes, construction cranes collapsing on the sidewalks, manhole covers blowing up and asbestos shooting into the sky.
Denis Leary
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My goal is to leave this planet with the biggest carbon footprint I can possibly leave.
Denis Leary
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I'm a huge Kevin Youkilis fan.
Denis Leary
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I've always had a thing for Catwoman. Michelle Pfeiffer or Halle Berry in tight leather pants, with the boots - I'm pretty good with either one.
Denis Leary
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I'm in my truck talking to Jesus. And you can see a World Series ring on my right pinkie finger. But when I take my sunglasses off a second later, it's gone. It's the whole divine intervention thing. You know Jesus had something to do with them winning.
Denis Leary
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Everyone's got skeletons in their closet, and I've got a million in mine, believe me. I tested the envelope I pushed it. Whenever somebody in authority told me not to do something, I did it just to find out why they said not to do it.
Denis Leary
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My brother and I tortured my mother growing up.
Denis Leary
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I would have to commit a crime and have cops chase me. That would be the only way to get me to jog five miles.
Denis Leary
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I do have to say that I think that President Obama is the greatest President in the history of all of our Presidents, and that he can do no wrong in my book. So how's that for prejudice on the Democratic side?
Denis Leary
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It's human nature for people to expect people to be what they see on the screen.
Denis Leary
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If you see me doing a new stand-up special, it probably means I've been out of work for a while.
Denis Leary