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I care about politics, but I have a tough time making comedy out of it. I was so happy to have a chance to be on The Daily Show, and I think Jon Stewart's so funny... but mostly in my own comedy, I care about less relevant things.
Demetri Martin
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Demetri Martin
Age: 51
Born: 1973
Born: May 25
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Score Composer
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Voice Actor
New York City
New York
Demetri Evan Martin
Time
Happy
Stewart
Think
Less
Relevant
Thinking
Show
Mostly
Funny
Daily
Making
Tough
Shows
Comedy
Care
Politics
Things
Chance
More quotes by Demetri Martin
I think there's a difference between making comedy and reporting comedy. When you're a joke teller you can easily fall into the second, you can show up and just say the jokes.
Demetri Martin
I love bowling almost as much as I love not bowling.
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My mind says one thing, but my body says another. Thanks a lot, Indian food and beer.
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I believe in empathy. When religion provides that for people, it's the best thing in the world.
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Popcorn is one of the only situations in which you eat the result of an explosion.
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Employee of the month is a good example of how somebody can be both a winner and a loser at the same time.
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I was student council president in high school, and even in law school, I was vice-president of the student bar association.
Demetri Martin
I want to launch a globe into space just to mess with the astronauts.
Demetri Martin
The shortest feedback loop I can think of is doing improvisation in front of an audience.
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A parade looks like a bunch of people are excited about being in traffic.
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Rock is fine. No structural damage to rock. Rock can break through paper at any point. Just say the word. Paper sucks.
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Checkers taught me that a King is a man with another man on top of him. But life taught me that that's actually called a Queen.
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It's hard to know what's gay in life. Boxing. That's two men fighting over a belt.
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Planning trip around the globe, that is in my room.
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REGARDING THE MARCHING BAND: How much more interesting it would be to see a creeping band.
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I was stuck in traffic and I looked in the mirror and in the car behind me there was a couple having a horrible argument and right below their image it said Objects In Mirror Are Closer Than They Appear. I just thought, man I hope so because she was pretty mad.
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I can always tell how stupid someone is by how certain they are about what they're saying.
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It's interesting to be an adult and to have that level of ignorance about something, because the nice part about is you get that discovery. The learning curve is so rich and steep.
Demetri Martin
I would like to have windshield wipers that do the whole windshield, please.
Demetri Martin
I saw a transvestite wearing a T-shirt that said 'Guess'.
Demetri Martin
