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A cool tattoo design is any drawing that would also look good saggy.
Demetri Martin
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Demetri Martin
Age: 51
Born: 1973
Born: May 25
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Score Composer
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Voice Actor
New York City
New York
Demetri Evan Martin
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More quotes by Demetri Martin
You can say 'Thanks,' and you can say 'Thanks a Million' - but any number in between?
Demetri Martin
The shortest feedback loop I can think of is doing improvisation in front of an audience.
Demetri Martin
Popcorn is one of the only situations in which you eat the result of an explosion.
Demetri Martin
If I make my window ten days for stand-up, the conclusion is that I failed and that I'm not good at stand-up. If I make it ten years - if I just wait - the conclusion might be something totally different. I think it's so cool to do things in which you discover the malleability of your own mind.
Demetri Martin
I am a ceiling fan, especially during rain.
Demetri Martin
It's Thursday and it really feels like a Thursday. Sometimes things just work out.
Demetri Martin
It is interesting that the black BMW is the preferred car of so many assholes.
Demetri Martin
I'm so secretive that when someone asks me, Hey, can you keep a secret? I say That's none of your business.
Demetri Martin
Whenever I throw caution to the wind I make sure I'm facing the right way so that it doesn't blow back and hit me in my face.
Demetri Martin
A lot of things look cooler in slow motion. Eating isn't one of them.
Demetri Martin
I saw a sign that said, 'Watch for children.' I was like, 'That sounds like a fair trade - especially if they're crappy kids.'
Demetri Martin
If I ever saw an amputee getting hanged, I'd probably just start calling out letters.
Demetri Martin
Why are there not positive mysteries? It's always who stole the diamond, or who killed the butler? How about... who made cookies, somebody cleaned my room.
Demetri Martin
I think since I was kid people told me that they thought I was funny.
Demetri Martin
I don't know if I'll ever be a master at anything, but I think that's a mistake for me personally. I don't know how much it's about the journey, but it's more about the process.
Demetri Martin
I walk around and think about things. When I come across a thought that makes me laugh, I write it down. Then, at night, I say the thought to people through a microphone. I don't think about politics or pop culture very much, so those thoughts don't often make it to the microphone.
Demetri Martin
As a comic, I think I'm very verbally oriented about a lot of the stuff that I've written or thought up and how I say it.
Demetri Martin
I still like paper books. Like, book is a flammable object. After you read it, you could use it to get warm. Or it could become a pile of napkins.
Demetri Martin
The bird, the bee, the running child are all the same to the sliding glass door.
Demetri Martin
I was student council president in high school, and even in law school, I was vice-president of the student bar association.
Demetri Martin
