Share
×
Inspirational Quotes
Authors
Professions
Topics
Tags
Quote
Planning trip around the globe, that is in my room.
Demetri Martin
Share
Change background
T
T
T
Change font
Original
TAGS & TOPICS
Demetri Martin
Age: 51
Born: 1973
Born: May 25
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Score Composer
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Voice Actor
New York City
New York
Demetri Evan Martin
Trip
Planning
Room
Rooms
Around
Globe
Globes
More quotes by Demetri Martin
When I am holding a water balloon, so many things look so unnecessarily dry.
Demetri Martin
Never be less interesting than your refrigerator magnets.
Demetri Martin
I've often liked a girl, made her laugh, and thought she liked me, and then found out that she didn't like me that way. I've definitely done time in the friend zone.
Demetri Martin
To get strangers to hate you even faster, crank up the volume on that very interesting ringtone of yours.
Demetri Martin
I just started doing this one-man show, and I wanted to be able to score it, so I bought a guitar, and got a keyboard and got a harmonica. I remember when I started that I didn't understand why a harmonica had different letters on them.
Demetri Martin
The bird, the bee, the running child are all the same to the sliding glass door.
Demetri Martin
I wrapped my Christmas presents early this year, but I used the wrong paper. See, the paper I used said 'Happy Birthday' on it. I didn't want to waste it so I just wrote 'Jesus' on it.
Demetri Martin
One of the most difficult and ironic murder weapons is the life jacket.
Demetri Martin
When someone shows you a picture of their kids what they don't want to hear is Oh, yeah, I got pictures of your kid too.
Demetri Martin
You are ten times more likely to get hit by a car when the driver is aiming for you.
Demetri Martin
I saw a transvestite wearing a T-shirt that said 'Guess'.
Demetri Martin
Canoe plus waterfall equals I don't go camping anymore.
Demetri Martin
I'm so secretive that when someone asks me, Hey, can you keep a secret? I say That's none of your business.
Demetri Martin
I didn't do improv in college, I never performed, I didn't do theater either. I was in student government, I was a history major.
Demetri Martin
It seems that man's greatest natural enemy is the target.
Demetri Martin
It's very easy to turn a toy into an adult toy: Location, location, location.
Demetri Martin
If I make my window ten days for stand-up, the conclusion is that I failed and that I'm not good at stand-up. If I make it ten years - if I just wait - the conclusion might be something totally different. I think it's so cool to do things in which you discover the malleability of your own mind.
Demetri Martin
I never set out to do a sketch show.
Demetri Martin
Artistically, I find jokes really satisfying aesthetically, because there's something great about getting an idea down to a sentence or two.
Demetri Martin
For me and most of my friends who are comedians, if you've been doing comedy for a while, your tolerance for things actually moves. I find it very hard to be shocked, and when other people aggressively take offense to something, I'm sometimes confused.
Demetri Martin
