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My family was fine, it's just a different way of going about life. Creativity was not something that was isolated and identified and valued.
Demetri Martin
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Demetri Martin
Age: 51
Born: 1973
Born: May 25
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Score Composer
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Voice Actor
New York City
New York
Demetri Evan Martin
Creativity
Fine
Family
Different
Going
Something
Valued
Way
Identified
Life
Isolated
More quotes by Demetri Martin
I don't like thank you cards because I don't know what else to say. What do I put on the inside? See Front.
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If you happen to catch on fire during the show, do not panic or wave your arms around or scream or we wil give something to panic and wave you arms around and scream about.
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Turtles are greater than baby nephews, because it's ok to drop a turtle.
Demetri Martin
How to be a bouncer: be an asshole stand near a door.
Demetri Martin
Nothing wise was ever printed upon an apron.
Demetri Martin
There's a store in my neighborhood called Futon World. I like that name, 'Futon World.' Makes me think of a magical place that gets less and less comfortable over time.
Demetri Martin
My plumbing is all screwed up. Because it turns out, I do not own a garbage disposal.
Demetri Martin
You never forget your first kiss. And that's what makes it so hard to forgive my uncle.
Demetri Martin
I am everything and I am nothing. I am just kidding I am not everything and nothing. That would be ridiculous. I am just everything.
Demetri Martin
A know-it-all is a person who knows everything except for how annoying he is.
Demetri Martin
When telling a story about how wasted you were last night, stop.
Demetri Martin
I care about politics, but I have a tough time making comedy out of it. I was so happy to have a chance to be on The Daily Show, and I think Jon Stewart's so funny... but mostly in my own comedy, I care about less relevant things.
Demetri Martin
I wanna put stickers on turtles... I don't know why.
Demetri Martin
Statistics indicate that the average American is a guy named Brian who lives in Ohio.
Demetri Martin
There's a very fine line between giving someone the Heimlich maneuver and dry-humping a stranger.
Demetri Martin
How many of you are creative? I don't know, but for me, when you make a bunch of things over time and then you keep them... you forget. I look through my sketchbooks and I'm an audience for myself.
Demetri Martin
I think a lot of people who watch TV don't realize when they're watch TV shows and it says 'produced by' and producer, producer... there are all these producers. What the hell does a producer do? It's funny how much you have to worry about as a producer.
Demetri Martin
If only loud people were even half as interesting as they think they are.
Demetri Martin
I want to launch a globe into space just to mess with the astronauts.
Demetri Martin
It is interesting that the black BMW is the preferred car of so many assholes.
Demetri Martin
