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What I've learned about my self over the years is that I'm pretty restless. If I multitask it's probably because I have difficulty just focusing on one thing.

Demetri Martin

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Demetri Martin
Age: 51
Born: 1973
Born: May 25
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Score Composer
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Voice Actor
New York City
New York
Demetri Evan Martin
Pretty
Probably
Self
Thing
Multitask
Years
Focusing
Restless
Difficulty
Learned

More quotes by Demetri Martin

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A lot of things look cooler in slow motion. Eating isn't one of them.
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Do you have any Greek in you? That was just a tactful way of asking if you're pregnant. If you're not, then let's break up.
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REGARDING THE MARCHING BAND: How much more interesting it would be to see a creeping band.
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I think my favorite sound is the sound of someone not playing the bongos.
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I believe in empathy. When religion provides that for people, it's the best thing in the world.
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I've never read an article of clothing.
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Halloween's my favorite holiday because you don't have to spend it with your family.
Demetri Martin
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I want to launch a globe into space just to mess with the astronauts.
Demetri Martin
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How to be a bouncer: be an asshole stand near a door.
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I think, at first blush, the '60s always enticed me. There's something about the '60s, it's not hard to like it.
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I'm very hip-oriented. I focus on hips in my comedy - probably more than any other hipster comic who is out there hipping today. My hips, other hips. I work with my hips a great deal. That is what I do. But not in a gay way.
Demetri Martin
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When you're wearing an animal costume and something bad happens, your facial expression doesn't change. The animal is deadpan the whole time. If you're skiing in a gorilla suit and you fall, you just see a gorilla who has no emotion. It's just a stoic gorilla, wildly falling down a hill, out of control.
Demetri Martin
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The sofa is the enemy of productivity.
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Swimming is a confusing sport, because sometimes you do it for fun, and other times you do it to not die. And when I'm swimming, sometimes I'm not sure which one it is.
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I like parties, but I don't like piñatas because the pinata promotes violence against flamboyant animals. Hey, there's a donkey with some pizzazz. Let's kick its ass.
Demetri Martin
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I can always tell how stupid someone is by how certain they are about what they're saying.
Demetri Martin
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I find that a shirt is most similar to a napkin when I don't have a napkin.
Demetri Martin
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The problem with my balloon collection is that people always think there's a party. Settle down. It's not a party. It's just balloons.
Demetri Martin
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I set a personal record on Christmas. I got my shopping done three weeks ahead of time. I had all the presents back at my apartment, I was halfway through wrapping them, and I realized, 'Damn, I used the wrong wrapping paper.' The paper I used said, 'Happy Birthday.' I didn't want to waste it, so I just wrote 'Jesus' on it.
Demetri Martin
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It seems that man's greatest natural enemy is the target.
Demetri Martin