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To me, comedy is a game.

Demetri Martin

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Demetri Martin
Age: 51
Born: 1973
Born: May 25
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Score Composer
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Voice Actor
New York City
New York
Demetri Evan Martin
Games
Game
Comedy

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It's Thursday and it really feels like a Thursday. Sometimes things just work out.
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I think, at first blush, the '60s always enticed me. There's something about the '60s, it's not hard to like it.
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To get strangers to hate you even faster, crank up the volume on that very interesting ringtone of yours.
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Statistics indicate that the average American is a guy named Brian who lives in Ohio.
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When telling a story about how wasted you were last night, stop.
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It feels like every day or two, people on Twitter and the Internet are outraged about something.
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I want to get the joke to work without having to put any words or to say anything. I just want the person to look at it, and quietly in their brain, they can just put it together and say, Cool, that one works.
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I need to develop some patience - immediately.
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Halloween: the day each year when strangers give you even more specific reasons to dislike them based on what they are wearing.
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I was on the train the other day, and I heard somebody say, I'm really good at checkers. That's the same thing as saying, I'm not good at very many things.
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If you drink enough beer, everything turns in to a bed.
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The boomerang is Australia's chief export (and then import).
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I think it would be worse to get mauled by a dancing bear than just a regular bear because you can't totally blame the dancing bear.
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I like to stand near ATM machines, and when somebody types in their pin number, I go, 'Got it!' And then I run away.
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There are very few songs about just liking someone as a friend.
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I am everything and I am nothing. I am just kidding I am not everything and nothing. That would be ridiculous. I am just everything.
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I like birthdays because we celebrate life with cakes. It's so cool. Sometimes when I see a baby, I'm like that much more cake in the world. But then when someone dies, I'm like the cake streak is over.
Demetri Martin
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A know-it-all is a person who knows everything except for how annoying he is.
Demetri Martin
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I think if I pick the right thing to spend my time doing, then time moves differently, because I really can get fully immersed in things and feel very alive and challenged, but in a good way. I feel a sense of progress.
Demetri Martin
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I don't know what the long form of OK is. I wanna think it's okie dokie. 'I'm okie dokie. I'm a little shaken up, but I'm okie dokie.' 'The good news is, she's okie dokie. The surgery went fine.'
Demetri Martin