Quote

Stand-up is like a row boat: it's fun and romantic when you're choosing to do it. But if you have no other choice than to be in a row boat it's not as enjoyable that's survival.

Demetri Martin

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Demetri Martin
Age: 51
Born: 1973
Born: May 25
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Score Composer
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Voice Actor
New York City
New York
Demetri Evan Martin
Fun
Stand
Choices
Enjoyable
Like
Choosing
Boat
Romantic
Survival
Choice

More quotes by Demetri Martin

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If you stretched the average person's intestines out from end to end, it would make them scream a lot.
Demetri Martin
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Leave no stone unturned in your quest to disrupt a rock garden.
Demetri Martin
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Man is the most powerful creature on the planet. And we're arrogant. I mean, people own birds. It's like, there's a creature with the gift of flight. I want it. I'm going to put it in my kitchen and make it crap on old information.
Demetri Martin
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I've never read an article of clothing.
Demetri Martin
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It's funny: when people always talk about the importance of role models, I used to think that was so exaggerated, but as I get older, I start to realize I don't feel that way so much anymore. If you see somebody like you who's doing something, an older version of what you are, it does make you feel like it's more possible.
Demetri Martin
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I didn't do improv in college, I never performed, I didn't do theater either. I was in student government, I was a history major.
Demetri Martin
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Never be less interesting than your refrigerator magnets.
Demetri Martin
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The worst time to have a heart attack is during a game of charades.
Demetri Martin
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I'm a body builder, but I don't use weights. I use snacks. It's kind of a different building process.
Demetri Martin
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One of the most difficult and ironic murder weapons is the life jacket.
Demetri Martin
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I care about politics, but I have a tough time making comedy out of it. I was so happy to have a chance to be on The Daily Show, and I think Jon Stewart's so funny... but mostly in my own comedy, I care about less relevant things.
Demetri Martin
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Usually, I walk around and think about things. When I come across a thought that makes me laugh, I write it down.
Demetri Martin
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One thing you never hear is Man that guy is good at badminton.
Demetri Martin
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Surprise parties are strange 'cause people jump up and they yell the word, 'surprise' at the party. I came home and you emerged from my furniture. You don't have to tell me how to feel. I don't need a hint.
Demetri Martin
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The key to life is balance, especially if you are on a ledge.
Demetri Martin
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I wonder what the most intelligent thing ever said was that started with the word 'dude.' 'Dude, these are isotopes.' 'Dude, we removed your kidney. You're gonna be fine.' 'Dude, I am so stoked to win this Nobel Prize. I just wanna thank Kevin, and Turtle, and all my homies.'
Demetri Martin
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Dogs seem more photogenic than cats. In photos most cats look like sociopaths.
Demetri Martin
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A good name for a gang would be The Uneducated Idiot Tough Guys.
Demetri Martin
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When I was a kid, I always wanted to live in California because I liked skateboarding.
Demetri Martin
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Stand up is really fun because if I think of a joke or a funny idea, then I can just go and tell some people and if they laugh, they laugh right away.
Demetri Martin