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I was walking in the park and this guy waved at me. Then he said, 'I'm sorry, I thought you were someone else.' I said, 'I am.'
Demetri Martin
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Demetri Martin
Age: 51
Born: 1973
Born: May 25
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Score Composer
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Voice Actor
New York City
New York
Demetri Evan Martin
Walks
Hiking
Guy
Park
Funny
Parks
Else
Wander
Someone
Sorry
Waved
Thought
Walking
Sauntering
Journey
Trekking
Humor
Strolling
More quotes by Demetri Martin
I want to make a revolving door that says 'Pull' on it, just see how obedient people are.
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Sometimes I feel like I'm being watched, but then I remember that my show was canceled three years ago.
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Stand up is really fun because if I think of a joke or a funny idea, then I can just go and tell some people and if they laugh, they laugh right away.
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I was a good student when I was a kid, and I did everything I was supposed to do, and I got A's.
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The worst time to have a heart attack is during a game of charades.
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And as far as actors go, Peter Sellers is my all-time favorite.
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They say that structure is freedom, and in a sense it is. When you're dealing with multiple constraints, you have to figure out what you can get out of that.
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A human head looks the least scary when it is attached.
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I don't know if I'll ever be a master at anything, but I think that's a mistake for me personally. I don't know how much it's about the journey, but it's more about the process.
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I think a lot of stuff I find funny is from day dreaming.
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Nothing wise was ever printed upon an apron.
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Separate but equal is terrible for education but it's perfect for eyebrows.
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I think a lot of people who watch TV don't realize when they're watch TV shows and it says 'produced by' and producer, producer... there are all these producers. What the hell does a producer do? It's funny how much you have to worry about as a producer.
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A couple weeks ago I was on the street and I saw an ugly pregnant lady, and I just thought, 'Good for you.'
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I used to get bummed out when it rained then I realized that it's God's way of washing off hippies.
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I need to develop some patience - immediately.
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I can always tell how stupid someone is by how certain they are about what they're saying.
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Another thing that I like and that's fun for me is to try and talk and play music at the same time, because I feel like I'm learning something. There are these little challenges built into it it's a way to push myself a little bit more as a performer.
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Dogs seem more photogenic than cats. In photos most cats look like sociopaths.
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I wasn't the class clown, but I was starting to become the crazy guy at law school, which is the guy who is not so much crazy as annoying.
Demetri Martin
