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The favorite game of temperamental people is Try to Guess Why I’m Ticked Off. (Contestant number one, Why do YOU think he’s pissed off? Why, I’m not sure, Bob, but I’m going to go with ‘Because I Left the Faucet Dripping.’ BEEP. I’m sorry, that’s incorrect. The correct answer is: ‘Because You Happen to Exist.’)

Deb Caletti

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Deb Caletti
Age: 61
Born: 1963
Born: June 16
Novelist
Writer
San Rafael
California
Think
Answers
Favorite
Faucet
Thinking
Happen
Sorry
Temperamental
People
Sure
Guess
Contestants
Games
Answer
Incorrect
Left
Exist
Dripping
Happens
Number
Pissed
Contestant
Trying
Numbers
Bob
Beep
Going
Game
Correct
Ticked

More quotes by Deb Caletti

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It's shocking the things we call love.
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Fate is a shape-shifter. It is the kindest and most generous entity imaginable, laying out more goodness than a person deserves, and then it shrinks and curls and forms into something grotesque. You think something is one thing, but then it´s another.
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We can get so wrapped up in our own misconceptions that we miss the simple beauty of the truth.
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It makes you realize how basically everything we do comes down to a) mating or b) competing for resources. It’s just like Animal Planet, only we’ve got Cover Girl and Victoria’s Secret instead of colored feathers and fancy markings, and the violence occurs at the Nordstrom’s Half-Yearly Sale.
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Yeah. When you want what's real and you try to find that in high school, you might as well be looking for a mossy rock beside a babbling brook on the corner of Sixth and Pine in downtown Seattle.
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...forever is hard enough without it beginning now.
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If letting go, if letting people and things work themselves out in the way that they needed to without your help was the most important thing, then it was also the hardest.
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If time heals all wounds, and a book can hold a person's entire life, then you can speed up the process with a pulp time warp.
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Love can come when you're already who you are, when you're filled with you. Not when you look to someone else to fill the empty space.
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Just because it turned out bad, doesn’t mean it wasn’t meant.
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I could forget that part, but it had to have been true.
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Love seems to be something to approach with caution, as if you'd come across a wrapped box in the middle of the street and have no idea what it contains.
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Here, kitty, kitty, Chico says. The cover of his cage is still on, making his tiny clown voice slightly muffled. I feel bad for him under there, just waiting to start his evil little day...Freud walks toward Chico in his slinky fashion, sits under his cage and just stares. We have satanic pets...our pets seem to have made a pact with the devil.
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All of us create our own versions of an event, of our lives, even, not because were liars, necessarily, but because we can only see and understand the truth from our own viewpoint, and a shifting viewpoint at that.
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There are so many different fifteens. And eighteens. And forty-twos, for that matter. Mature fifteens and young fifteens and wise fifteens and lost fifteens. And angry fifteens.
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Fear was the biggest bullshitter, he’d said. But sometimes, too, fear told the truth.
Deb Caletti
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I've heard that people stand in bad situations because a relationship like that gets turned up by degrees. It is said that a frog will jump out of a pot of boiling water. Place him in a pot and turn it up a little at a time, and he will stay until he is boiled to death. Us frogs understand this.
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All of my books come from something that I happen to be working out at a given point in my life. Its kind of self-therapy.
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Summer, after all, is a time when wonderful things can happen to quiet people.
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... But then again, a person could turn ugly. Their actual look could change when their actions were repulsive.
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