Quote

Don't make your kids look hot and dirty and sexy when they're 5-years old! It's really not the place or the time. You're about 11 years early.

David Spade

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David Spade
Age: 60
Born: 1964
Born: July 22
Actor
Film Actor
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Birmingham
Michigan
David Wayne Spade
Years
Hot
Really
Dirty
Make
Sexy
Time
Early
Place
Kids
Look
Looks

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I've got people who like Tommy Boy, but they're getting older and there's a whole new wave of college kids who see that and Joe Dirt, and Just Shoot Me is a little older, so I wanted stuff for everybody.
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It's hard to have a career.
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Now that I have the opportunities to do a lot, I want to do less.
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I got into stand-up to get on a sitcom.
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Single guys get a bad rap.
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Whenever you get on the plane, the flight attendant will always tell you the name of your pilot. Like anyone goes, Oh, he's good.
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I changed my act because I wasn't getting booked.
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I talk to my dad all the time, he's more like my buddy than my father, and he's not happy that I use him in my act. But I tell him, I have to get something out of this.
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My school of thought is, anything goes, but I can't do that anymore.
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Seriously, you don't have to know English. It'd be nice, a nice little plus. We don't want miracles. You don't have to know the country's language. But just some shapes, that's all. A square. A little geometry.
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As boys get older, they can't let on that it's cool to meet me.
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To make money I picked up work as a busboy, valet parker, skateboard shop employee.
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I'm scared of slipping up, of just doing a joke that makes me laugh.
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It's great to tell people you have your own show, but that's where the fun stops.
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I'm a gentleman and I was always taught it's rude, to talk about a woman's age or weight unless you are breaking up with her.
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It's good to do stand-up. It kind of wakes you up and makes you feel like you're doing something. You got the crowd right there. That's all fun.
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I have no stories to sell. A lot of my relationships are with civilians, and no one wants to hear about those.
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I have two skateboards, but I don't get to use them much. I have a snowboard, which I've never used.
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In grade school I was smart, but I didn't have any friends. In high school, I quit being smart and started having friends.
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If I try to cover too much ground, you start to get watered down and less interesting.
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