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Now that I have the opportunities to do a lot, I want to do less.

David Spade

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David Spade
Age: 60
Born: 1964
Born: July 22
Actor
Film Actor
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Birmingham
Michigan
David Wayne Spade
Opportunities
Less
Opportunity

More quotes by David Spade

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I wish I had that carefree lifestyle. But I guess I'm more private, and more inside.
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Whenever you get on the plane, the flight attendant will always tell you the name of your pilot. Like anyone goes, Oh, he's good.
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In grade school I was smart, but I didn't have any friends. In high school, I quit being smart and started having friends.
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Success? You can't get a big head about it. When people stare at me, they could be whispering to their friend, That guy sucks! Have you seen him before? He's horrible.
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It's funny because it's funny.
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I changed my act because I wasn't getting booked.
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It's just easier to make fun and cut down. It's kind of a way of life in America. If you can make people want to hear what you're going to say, it can be cruel and funny.
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Most of the shows I want to do I'm not smart enough to figure out how to watch.
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My fellow nerds and I will retire to the nerdery with our calculators.
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Gossip is a plague that consumes weak, gullible people and blinds them from the truth of reality it can devour entire city's. I prefer keeping my eyes wide open.
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I talk to my dad all the time, he's more like my buddy than my father, and he's not happy that I use him in my act. But I tell him, I have to get something out of this.
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I'm scared of slipping up, of just doing a joke that makes me laugh.
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I've got to get on myself to be sharp, funny and loose.
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I'm still blow drying my hair, just trying to keep doing stuff that's fun.
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To make money I picked up work as a busboy, valet parker, skateboard shop employee.
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I have no stories to sell. A lot of my relationships are with civilians, and no one wants to hear about those.
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It's good to do stand-up. It kind of wakes you up and makes you feel like you're doing something. You got the crowd right there. That's all fun.
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There's always something funny about men chasing women.
David Spade
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I got into stand-up to get on a sitcom.
David Spade
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I never have kids in movies or in TV shows.
David Spade