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I just don't like to go out and deal with the real world. It's scary.

David Spade

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David Spade
Age: 60
Born: 1964
Born: July 22
Actor
Film Actor
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Birmingham
Michigan
David Wayne Spade
Real
Like
World
Scary
Deal
Deals

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I have two skateboards, but I don't get to use them much. I have a snowboard, which I've never used.
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I've had it where things didn't go well for me with movies or something that got canceled.
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I have no stories to sell. A lot of my relationships are with civilians, and no one wants to hear about those.
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I'm a gentleman and I was always taught it's rude, to talk about a woman's age or weight unless you are breaking up with her.
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There's always something funny about men chasing women.
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When my stepfather died, I just kind of fell apart. I felt pretty vulnerable, like there literally could be no tomorrow.
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I wish I had that carefree lifestyle. But I guess I'm more private, and more inside.
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If I try to cover too much ground, you start to get watered down and less interesting.
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With Saturday Night Live you're looking for any hook, any way to stay on the show.
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I'm scared of slipping up, of just doing a joke that makes me laugh.
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My older brother was cool, so I was suddenly cool by association. And I totally dusted all my old math friends.
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People come and go around you, but you're never the one getting the big stuff. I like that.
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I changed my act because I wasn't getting booked.
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As boys get older, they can't let on that it's cool to meet me.
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It's good to do stand-up. It kind of wakes you up and makes you feel like you're doing something. You got the crowd right there. That's all fun.
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It's funny because it's funny.
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I'm still blow drying my hair, just trying to keep doing stuff that's fun.
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I talk to my dad all the time, he's more like my buddy than my father, and he's not happy that I use him in my act. But I tell him, I have to get something out of this.
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It's so crazy in Hollywood.
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Seriously, you don't have to know English. It'd be nice, a nice little plus. We don't want miracles. You don't have to know the country's language. But just some shapes, that's all. A square. A little geometry.
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