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Most of the shows I want to do I'm not smart enough to figure out how to watch.

David Spade

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David Spade
Age: 60
Born: 1964
Born: July 22
Actor
Film Actor
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Birmingham
Michigan
David Wayne Spade
Figure
Figures
Smart
Watches
Watch
Shows
Enough

More quotes by David Spade

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My fellow nerds and I will retire to the nerdery with our calculators.
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It's just easier to make fun and cut down. It's kind of a way of life in America. If you can make people want to hear what you're going to say, it can be cruel and funny.
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I have no stories to sell. A lot of my relationships are with civilians, and no one wants to hear about those.
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My older brother was cool, so I was suddenly cool by association. And I totally dusted all my old math friends.
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I never have kids in movies or in TV shows.
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I've got to get on myself to be sharp, funny and loose.
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I've had it where things didn't go well for me with movies or something that got canceled.
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My school of thought is, anything goes, but I can't do that anymore.
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Now that I have the opportunities to do a lot, I want to do less.
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Whenever you get on the plane, the flight attendant will always tell you the name of your pilot. Like anyone goes, Oh, he's good.
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It's good to do stand-up. It kind of wakes you up and makes you feel like you're doing something. You got the crowd right there. That's all fun.
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When my stepfather died, I just kind of fell apart. I felt pretty vulnerable, like there literally could be no tomorrow.
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It's hard to have a career.
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I just don't like to go out and deal with the real world. It's scary.
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I'm a gentleman and I was always taught it's rude, to talk about a woman's age or weight unless you are breaking up with her.
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It's great to tell people you have your own show, but that's where the fun stops.
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With Saturday Night Live you're looking for any hook, any way to stay on the show.
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I'm scared of slipping up, of just doing a joke that makes me laugh.
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Gossip is a plague that consumes weak, gullible people and blinds them from the truth of reality it can devour entire city's. I prefer keeping my eyes wide open.
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I got into stand-up to get on a sitcom.
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