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It's funny because it's funny.

David Spade

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David Spade
Age: 60
Born: 1964
Born: July 22
Actor
Film Actor
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Birmingham
Michigan
David Wayne Spade
Funny

More quotes by David Spade

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I have no stories to sell. A lot of my relationships are with civilians, and no one wants to hear about those.
David Spade
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Bill Murray I always liked. I'm not as good as him, but there's a quality in him that I like. And then there's DeNiro, I'll never be that.
David Spade
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I talk to my dad all the time, he's more like my buddy than my father, and he's not happy that I use him in my act. But I tell him, I have to get something out of this.
David Spade
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Single guys get a bad rap.
David Spade
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When my stepfather died, I just kind of fell apart. I felt pretty vulnerable, like there literally could be no tomorrow.
David Spade
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People come and go around you, but you're never the one getting the big stuff. I like that.
David Spade
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It's so crazy in Hollywood.
David Spade
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I have two skateboards, but I don't get to use them much. I have a snowboard, which I've never used.
David Spade
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I've got to get on myself to be sharp, funny and loose.
David Spade
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Success? You can't get a big head about it. When people stare at me, they could be whispering to their friend, That guy sucks! Have you seen him before? He's horrible.
David Spade
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I got into stand-up to get on a sitcom.
David Spade
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Gossip is a plague that consumes weak, gullible people and blinds them from the truth of reality it can devour entire city's. I prefer keeping my eyes wide open.
David Spade
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Whenever you get on the plane, the flight attendant will always tell you the name of your pilot. Like anyone goes, Oh, he's good.
David Spade
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Now that I have the opportunities to do a lot, I want to do less.
David Spade
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My school of thought is, anything goes, but I can't do that anymore.
David Spade
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It's hard to have a career.
David Spade
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My fellow nerds and I will retire to the nerdery with our calculators.
David Spade
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I'm scared of slipping up, of just doing a joke that makes me laugh.
David Spade
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Most of the shows I want to do I'm not smart enough to figure out how to watch.
David Spade
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I changed my act because I wasn't getting booked.
David Spade