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There is a reason there is no such thing as a folk writer. But to be a writer you have learn what it takes to captivate a reader in order to make them turn the page. And in order to learn that, you have to read.
David Sedaris
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David Sedaris
Age: 67
Born: 1956
Born: December 26
Comedian
Essayist
Humorist
Writer
Binghamton
New York
David Raymond Sedaris
Reason
Page
Thing
Reader
Make
Writer
Turn
Takes
Read
Learn
Captivate
Order
Folk
More quotes by David Sedaris
Art isn't about following the rules. It's about breaking them.
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A zoo is a good place to make a spectacle of yourself, as the people around you have creepier, more photogenic things to look at.
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The landscape is best described as 'pedestrian hostile.' It's pointless to try to take a walk, so I generally just stay in the room and think about shooting myself in the head.
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In my dream world gay people in America would get the right to marry, and not a one of them would use that right.
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I sometimes read books on my iPad.
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Speed eliminates all doubt. Am I smart enough? Will people like me? Do I really look all right in this plastic jumpsuit?
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I hated leaving a hole in the smoking world, and so I recruited someone to take my place. People have given me a lot of grief, but I'm pretty sure that after high school, this girl would have started anyway, especially if she chose the army over community college.
David Sedaris
I don't like travelling if I know I have to write about it.
David Sedaris
Given enough time, I guess anything can look good. All it has to do is survive.
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I can't promise I'll never kill anyone again, he once said, strapping a refrigerator to his back. It's unrealistic to live your life within such strict parameters
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Paul Rudnick is a champion of truth (and love and great wicked humor) whom we ignore at our peril.
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I'm not afraid to write about madness. I always figure that whatever most embarrasses you is something that everyone can relate to, really...because we're just not that different. So if you think, 'Oh my god, this is so embarrassing. I can't possibly talk about that,' and you write about it, the audience is gonna be like, 'that happened to me!
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Maybe one day, I would write a story about arguing in public, and those would come in handy in some way.
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I went from having 50 listeners to 50 million listeners.
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High school taught me a valuable lesson about glasses: Don't wear them. Contacts have always seemed like too much work, so instead I just squint, figuring that if something is more than ten feet away, I'll just deal with it when I get there.
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Sometimes people say, do you want a drink? And I say, oh, I'd like to, but I'm a tragic alcoholic. I always say tragic. I'm a tragic alcoholic.
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To spend your days in the company of naked men - that was the life for me. 'Turn a bit to the left, Jean-Claude. I long to capture the playful quality of your buttocks.
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He looked as though his life had not only passed him by but paused along the way to spit in his face.
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Say what you will about the south, but in North Carolina a hot dog is free to swing anyway it wishes.
David Sedaris
I always think it's a good policy to like the people who like you.
David Sedaris