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You really burden the reader if you put things in but, Oh, it's not interesting, but I'll put it in anyway. Then the reader's going to think, like, Mmm... no thanks. So the thing is to cut all that stuff out before its published.
David Sedaris
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David Sedaris
Age: 67
Born: 1956
Born: December 26
Comedian
Essayist
Humorist
Writer
Binghamton
New York
David Raymond Sedaris
Thinking
Cutting
Like
Interesting
Stuff
Thing
Published
Going
Anyway
Really
Thanks
Things
Burden
Think
Reader
More quotes by David Sedaris
If you are any kind of an artist, then validation . . . can be a result, but you're going to do the work anyway.
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there's a reason regular people don't appear on TV: we're boring.
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Comfort has its place, but it seems rude to visit another country dressed as if you’ve come to mow its lawns.
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We were not a hugging people. In terms of emotional comfort it was our belief that no amount of physical contact could match the healing powers of a well made cocktail.
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I haven't got the slightest idea how to change people, but still I keep a long list of prospective candidates just in case I should ever figure it out.
David Sedaris
but I have no mind for business and considered staying awake to be enough of an accomplishment.
David Sedaris
Of course, the diary helps me as well. 'That wasn't your position on July 7, 1991,' I'll remind Hugh an hour after we've had a fight. I'd have loved to rebut him sooner, but it takes awhile to look these things up.
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The thought of killing myself had slowed me down to five miles per hour. The thought of killing someone else stopped me completely.
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Hugh consoled me, saying, Don't let it get to you. There are plenty of things you're good at. When asked for some examples, he listed vacuuming and naming stuffed animals. He says he can probably come up with a few more, but he'll need some time to think.
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The things I've bought from strangers in the dark would curl your hair.
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Say what you will about the south, but in North Carolina a hot dog is free to swing anyway it wishes.
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You know, when you need drugs and you don't have a lot of money, what you'll do is you'll hang out with people who will give you drugs. Right?
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It's unrealistic to live your life within such strict parameters.
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I don't like to read anything on the radio for the very first time, because I don't have any notion of a reaction. When I read it out loud, then I get an idea of that, and more of an idea of how to read.
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I didn't know about the rest of the class, but when Bastille Day eventually rolled around, I planned to stay home and clean my oven.
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I've often lost faith in myself, I've never lost it in my family.
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Most people, or at least most of the people that I've come into contact with, would like to be written about.
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I always used to reach for the cigarette when the phone rang, and I figured nobody would ever call me in Tokyo. The time difference is so profound it's, like, already September in Tokyo, and I figured nobody would be able to work it out.
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To spend your days in the company of naked men - that was the life for me. 'Turn a bit to the left, Jean-Claude. I long to capture the playful quality of your buttocks.
David Sedaris
Paul Rudnick is a champion of truth (and love and great wicked humor) whom we ignore at our peril.
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