Quote

I've never made up events, but I've always been a big exaggerator. It's written on my humorist license that I'm allowed to do that.

David Sedaris

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David Sedaris
Age: 67
Born: 1956
Born: December 26
Comedian
Essayist
Humorist
Writer
Binghamton
New York
David Raymond Sedaris
Events
Written
Bigs
Made
Always
Humorist
Never
Humorists
License
Allowed

More quotes by David Sedaris

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Whenever I write about my family, I start by getting my parent`s approval. I like to think I write about them with obvious affection. When it comes to the people I'm related to, I consider myself to be very lucky.
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I always knew I wanted it to be illustrated.
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All I do is lie, and that has made me immune to compliments.
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Everyone looks retarded once you set your mind to it.
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If you are any kind of an artist, then validation . . . can be a result, but you're going to do the work anyway.
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Do I exaggerate? Boy, do I, and I'd do it more if I could get away with it.
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I see you that have a little swimming mouse
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I've maintained old friendships, like with people I knew in the nineteen-seventies, but have lost the knack for meeting new people. This has a lot to do with my writing schedule. I don't want to be disturbed, and the willingness to be disturbed is, I think, part of being a good friend.
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I don't really do very well when I'm sent somewhere. A lot of magazines want to send you somewhere to do something. They want you to stow away on a ship, or something like that.
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A zoo is a good place to make a spectacle of yourself, as the people around you have creepier, more photogenic things to look at.
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I think if you write humor, then people don't - you know - they don't give you that much credit. They tend to think you just dictate your stories into a tape recorder. And I'm not necessarily insulted by that, because I think that just means that it looks easy.
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I like to reserve the right to write about whatever I like.
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It didn't seem fair to me that Jon Stewart's rally didn't get the same kind of attention that Glenn Beck's did. Why was Beck's seen as checking the thermometer of the country, and Jon Stewart just dismissed as a satirist?
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I'm not afraid to write about madness. I always figure that whatever most embarrasses you is something that everyone can relate to, really...because we're just not that different. So if you think, 'Oh my god, this is so embarrassing. I can't possibly talk about that,' and you write about it, the audience is gonna be like, 'that happened to me!
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Say what you will about the south, but in North Carolina a hot dog is free to swing anyway it wishes.
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I find it ridiculous to assign a gender to an inanimate object incapable of disrobing and making an occasional fool of itself.
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After a few months in my parents' basement, I took an apartment near the state university, where I discovered both crystal methamphetamine and conceptual art. Either one of these things are dangerous, but in combination they have the potential to destroy entire civilizations.
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Comfort has its place, but it seems rude to visit another country dressed as if you’ve come to mow its lawns.
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Snowball just leads elves on, elves and Santas. He is playing a dangerous game.
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Because I've always been a fairly nervous person.
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