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Whenever I write about my family, I start by getting my parent`s approval. I like to think I write about them with obvious affection. When it comes to the people I'm related to, I consider myself to be very lucky.

David Sedaris

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David Sedaris
Age: 67
Born: 1956
Born: December 26
Comedian
Essayist
Humorist
Writer
Binghamton
New York
David Raymond Sedaris
People
Getting
Related
Family
Affection
Comes
Whenever
Write
Obvious
Writing
Consider
Think
Lucky
Thinking
Parent
Like
Start
Approval

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Being locked up is one thing, but to have no concept of confinement, to be ignorant of its terms and never understand that struggle is useless - that's what hell must be like.
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All of a sudden, when you're exposed to a large audience, they think you just started writing that day, but I started years before. I look back at things I wrote then and I'm so embarrassed - the writing seems so blocky and choppy to me and I wouldn't have wanted success any sooner because the writing was even worse.
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The thought of killing myself had slowed me down to five miles per hour. The thought of killing someone else stopped me completely.
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It didn't seem fair to me that Jon Stewart's rally didn't get the same kind of attention that Glenn Beck's did. Why was Beck's seen as checking the thermometer of the country, and Jon Stewart just dismissed as a satirist?
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Weird doors open. People fall into things.
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I'd always thought that I understood this, but lately I realize that what I call understanding is basically just fantasizing.
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I always think it's a good policy to like the people who like you.
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It was the look you get when facing a sudden and insurmountable danger: the errant truck, the shaky ladder, the crazy person who pins you to the linoleum and insists, with increasing urgency, that everything you know and love can be undone by a grape.
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The things I've bought from strangers in the dark would curl your hair.
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Sometimes with 'The New Yorker,' they have grammar rules that just don't feel right in my mouth.
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People are often frightened of Parisians, but an American in Paris will find no harsher critic than another American.
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You really burden the reader if you put things in but, Oh, it's not interesting, but I'll put it in anyway. Then the reader's going to think, like, Mmm... no thanks. So the thing is to cut all that stuff out before its published.
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I just think that the people who say: 'That's not true' when someone tells a story at dinner are the people who didn't get any laughs when they told their story.
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Every so often my life will feel like a story. It doesn't have to be a big thing in fact, most often, it's just the opposite.
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The combination of ammonia and chloride can be lethal but I've discovered it can work miracles as long as you keep telling yourself, I want to love, I want to live.
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Sometimes the sins you haven't committed are all you have to hold on to. If you're really desperate, you might need to grope, saying, for example, I've never killed anyone with a hammer or I've never stolen from anyone who didn't deserve it.
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Do I exaggerate? Boy, do I, and I'd do it more if I could get away with it.
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Paul Rudnick is a champion of truth (and love and great wicked humor) whom we ignore at our peril.
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