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We can't profess love without talking through hand puppets.

David Sedaris

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David Sedaris
Age: 67
Born: 1956
Born: December 26
Comedian
Essayist
Humorist
Writer
Binghamton
New York
David Raymond Sedaris
Hands
Without
Love
Profess
Puppets
Hand
Talking

More quotes by David Sedaris

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I would be writing and trying to write like Joan Didion. Or if I was reading Raymond Carver. You know, strong stylists. But that's how you find your voice, is imitating other people. So things like that didn't embarrass me, because I thought, well, that's how it goes. That's how everyone learns.
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The things I've bought from strangers in the dark would curl your hair.
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I'm not a reporter but the 'New Yorker' treats everyone like a reporter.
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When I taught, a lot of my students weren't big readers, so they would write something and I realized that they thought it belonged in a book. Like, they didn't know what the inside of a book looked like, you know what I mean?
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In Japanese and Italian, the response to [How are you?] is I'm fine, and you? In German it's answered with a sigh and a slight pause, followed by Not so good.
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My family isn't really all that different from anyone else's. Well, maybe they're a bit more entertaining.
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If you are any kind of an artist, then validation . . . can be a result, but you're going to do the work anyway.
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I like to reserve the right to write about whatever I like.
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Lovers of audio books learn to live with compromise.
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Everyone looks retarded once you set your mind to it.
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Given enough time, I guess anything can look good. All it has to do is survive.
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Maybe one day, I would write a story about arguing in public, and those would come in handy in some way.
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I'm the most important person in the lives of almost everyone I know and a good number of the people I've never even met.
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I cry all the time when I watch 'Glee' because I don't know if it's satire or melodrama and that makes me feel like the writing is aware of itself, and that makes it OK to cry.
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It was the look you get when facing a sudden and insurmountable danger: the errant truck, the shaky ladder, the crazy person who pins you to the linoleum and insists, with increasing urgency, that everything you know and love can be undone by a grape.
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I don't like travelling if I know I have to write about it.
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but I have no mind for business and considered staying awake to be enough of an accomplishment.
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If you stepped out of the shower and saw a leprechaun standing at the base of your toilet, would you scream, or would you innately understand that he meant you no harm?
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I don't like to read anything on the radio for the very first time, because I don't have any notion of a reaction. When I read it out loud, then I get an idea of that, and more of an idea of how to read.
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As bad a dresser as I am, anything beats being judged by my character.
David Sedaris