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but I have no mind for business and considered staying awake to be enough of an accomplishment.
David Sedaris
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David Sedaris
Age: 67
Born: 1956
Born: December 26
Comedian
Essayist
Humorist
Writer
Binghamton
New York
David Raymond Sedaris
Staying
Awake
Considered
Business
Enough
Mind
Accomplishment
Lazy
More quotes by David Sedaris
I don't worry about being exposed. When I'm writing about myself I think about myself as a character. There is a ton of stuff going on in my life that I don't write about. If I need to write that stuff down, I write about myself in my diary.
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If you are any kind of an artist, then validation . . . can be a result, but you're going to do the work anyway.
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there's a reason regular people don't appear on TV: we're boring.
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If you stepped out of the shower and saw a leprechaun standing at the base of your toilet, would you scream, or would you innately understand that he meant you no harm?
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Now, I like a church service, but this was one of those write-your-own-vows sorts of things. Neither of them had ever picked up a pen in their life, but all of a sudden they’re poets, right, like that’s all it takes — being in love.
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If finding an apartment is like falling in love, buying one is like proposing on your first date and agreeing not to see each other until the wedding.
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I can't seem to fathom that the things important to me are not important to other people as well, and so I come off sounding like a missionary, someone whose job it is to convert rather than listen.
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God was someone I wound up turning over and over in my mind each night... Was He punishing me with this meal or was He rewarding me? Did He actively watch me or take me for granted like a fish you don't notice until it's floating on the surface of the tank?
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Given enough time, I guess anything can look good. All it has to do is survive.
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It make one's mouth hurt to speak with such forced merriment.
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Every so often my life will feel like a story. It doesn't have to be a big thing in fact, most often, it's just the opposite.
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You can't brace yourself for famine if you've never known hunger.
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I'd always thought that I understood this, but lately I realize that what I call understanding is basically just fantasizing.
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The Greeks had invented democracy, built the Acropolis and called it a day.
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Now I don't drink, and I get up in the morning and I write in my diary, and I can write in my diary for hours if I feel like it. And I'm still sober so I can write the stories that I'm working on, and I can sit at the desk as long as I need to. So that changed a lot, I think.
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Art isn't about following the rules. It's about breaking them.
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There is a reason there is no such thing as a folk writer. But to be a writer you have learn what it takes to captivate a reader in order to make them turn the page. And in order to learn that, you have to read.
David Sedaris
I always think it's a good policy to like the people who like you.
David Sedaris
Maybe one day, I would write a story about arguing in public, and those would come in handy in some way.
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When I look at a lot of older stuff that I've written, I think one sign of amateur humor writing is when you see people trying too hard.
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