Quote

A zoo is a good place to make a spectacle of yourself, as the people around you have creepier, more photogenic things to look at.

David Sedaris

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David Sedaris
Age: 67
Born: 1956
Born: December 26
Comedian
Essayist
Humorist
Writer
Binghamton
New York
David Raymond Sedaris
Looks
Make
Good
Photogenic
Things
Zoos
People
Spectacle
Place
Around
Look

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The Greeks had invented democracy, built the Acropolis and called it a day.
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I can't seem to fathom that the things important to me are not important to other people as well, and so I come off sounding like a missionary, someone whose job it is to convert rather than listen.
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I've never gone on Facebook and am not sure I understand it. The same goes for Twitter. I have someone sending tweets and pretending to be me, but I don't know why.
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but I have no mind for business and considered staying awake to be enough of an accomplishment.
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I've often lost faith in myself, I've never lost it in my family.
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Say what you will about the south, but in North Carolina a hot dog is free to swing anyway it wishes.
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In my dream world gay people in America would get the right to marry, and not a one of them would use that right.
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I just think that the people who say: 'That's not true' when someone tells a story at dinner are the people who didn't get any laughs when they told their story.
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whenever I read a passage that moves me, I transcribe it in my diary, hoping my fingers might learn what excellence feels like.
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We can't profess love without talking through hand puppets.
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A history of listening to Top 40 radio had left me with a ridiculous and clichéd notion of love. I had never entertained the feeling myself but knew that it meant never having to say you're sorry. It was a many-splendored thing. Love was a rose and a hammer. Both blind and all-seeing, it made the world go round.
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If you are any kind of an artist, then validation . . . can be a result, but you're going to do the work anyway.
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People are often frightened of Parisians, but an American in Paris will find no harsher critic than another American.
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It's hard to love a place that's outlawed smoking but finds it perfectly acceptable to serve raw fish in a bath of chocolate.
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It is funny the things that run through your mind when you're sitting in your underpants in front of a pair of strangers.
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The rabbit of Easter. He bring of the chocolate.
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In Japanese and Italian, the response to [How are you?] is I'm fine, and you? In German it's answered with a sigh and a slight pause, followed by Not so good.
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In the beginning, I was put off by the harshness of German. Someone would order a piece of cake, and it sounded as if it were an actual order, like, Cut the cake and lie facedown in that ditch between the cobbler and the little girl.
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I'd always thought that I understood this, but lately I realize that what I call understanding is basically just fantasizing.
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When they're born outside, crows come and pluck their eyes out.
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