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The rabbit of Easter. He bring of the chocolate.
David Sedaris
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David Sedaris
Age: 68
Born: 1956
Born: December 26
Comedian
Essayist
Humorist
Writer
Binghamton
New York
David Raymond Sedaris
Easter
Chocolate
Bring
Rabbit
Rabbits
More quotes by David Sedaris
If you read someone else's diary, you get what you deserve.
David Sedaris
Everyone looks retarded once you set your mind to it.
David Sedaris
There are lots of things that happen to me that I don't write about.
David Sedaris
I tend to write things seven times before I show them to my editor. I write them seven times, then I take them on tour, read them like a dozen times on tour, then go back to the room and rewrite, read and rewrite... I would never show him a first draft, because then he's really going to be sick of it by the twelfth draft.
David Sedaris
I don't like to read anything on the radio for the very first time, because I don't have any notion of a reaction. When I read it out loud, then I get an idea of that, and more of an idea of how to read.
David Sedaris
I think if you write humor, then people don't - you know - they don't give you that much credit. They tend to think you just dictate your stories into a tape recorder. And I'm not necessarily insulted by that, because I think that just means that it looks easy.
David Sedaris
Sometimes with 'The New Yorker,' they have grammar rules that just don't feel right in my mouth.
David Sedaris
It was the look you get when facing a sudden and insurmountable danger: the errant truck, the shaky ladder, the crazy person who pins you to the linoleum and insists, with increasing urgency, that everything you know and love can be undone by a grape.
David Sedaris
but I have no mind for business and considered staying awake to be enough of an accomplishment.
David Sedaris
I'm the most important person in the lives of almost everyone I know and a good number of the people I've never even met.
David Sedaris
As a child I assumed that when I reached adulthood, I would have grown-up thoughts.
David Sedaris
In my dream world gay people in America would get the right to marry, and not a one of them would use that right.
David Sedaris
I needed to temper (my dad's) enthusiasm a bit (about attending Princeton), and so I announced that I would be majoring in patricide...My mom was actually jealous.
David Sedaris
It was my friend Frank, a writer in San Francisco, who finally set me straight. When asked about my new look he put down his fork and stared at me for a few moments. A bow tie announces to the world you can no longer get an erection.
David Sedaris
I've never written about sex in my diary. Like if you read my diary, you wouldn't think I'm a virgin, but you would have no idea what it is that I've actually ever done.
David Sedaris
It is funny the things that run through your mind when you're sitting in your underpants in front of a pair of strangers.
David Sedaris
What other people call dark and despairing, I call funny.
David Sedaris
Most people, or at least most of the people that I've come into contact with, would like to be written about.
David Sedaris
I hated leaving a hole in the smoking world, and so I recruited someone to take my place. People have given me a lot of grief, but I'm pretty sure that after high school, this girl would have started anyway, especially if she chose the army over community college.
David Sedaris
My sister's the type who religiously watches the fear segments of her local Eyewitness News broadcasts, retaining nothing but the headline...Everything is dangerous all of the time, and if it's not yet been pulled off the shelves, then it's certainly under investigation -- so there.
David Sedaris