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If you zoom close-if you get really close to someone, if you really get close to yourself-then you lose the other person, you lose yourself entirely. You get so close you can't see anything anymore.

David Levithan

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David Levithan
Age: 52
Born: 1972
Born: September 7
Author
Novelist
Writer
Short Hills
New Jersey
Person
Entirely
Really
Anymore
Close
Lose
Loses
Someone
Anything
Persons
Zoom

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I had no idea what I wanted, only that I wanted something, which is the worst kind of wanting.
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They don’t have silences together they have noise. Mostly his.
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But if I didn’t want to be alone, then why didn’t I want to be with anyone else?
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Here, she said. This is for you. I didn't really get you anything, I sputtered. I mean, I didn't know that you were going to be here, and-- Don't worry. It's your embarrassment at not having the thought that counts.
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Part of growing up is making sure your sense of reality isn't entirely grounded in your own mind.
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Because it is senior year I have begun to see things as potential absences. The things I love will become the things I'll miss.
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And just like that, the universe goes wrong. Just like that, all the enormity seems to shrink into a ball and float away from my reach. I feel it, and she doesn't. Or I feel it, and she won't.
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me: you know what sucks about love? o.w.g.: what? me: that it's so tied to the truth.
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Maybe there is hope in the fragments, that what is lost can always be filled in by someone who knows.
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having someone think of me that way was like discovering a new window in the room i'd lived in all my life.
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If goodness can't come from bad things, it makes bad things unbearable.
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Long live protest songs, in whatever form they take.
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We are so used to releasing words. We don't know what to do with them if they stay.
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It was rather awkward, insofar as we were both teetering between the possibility of something and the possibility of nothing.
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But I want to feel like life matters. I had something real with you, but then the realness scared me. I decided to go for other things instead.
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This is as much a part of my story as anything else. Friendship is love as much as any romance.
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Every person is a possibility. The hopeless romantics feel it most acutely, but even for others, the only way to keep going is to see every person as a possibility.
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I cannot think of a single word to describe what we feel. I think we all feel it, to varying degrees. Perhaps in some other language there is a word for 'the world is terribly wrong.' That feeling of stun and unbelief and abandonment and shock and horror and distress.
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Once the storm comes out, the landscape changes. What you had before is altered in some way. And you have a choice: build something new and better from what is left or abandon it.
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So what do you have to confess now? I don't know why I'm saying any of this, except that is the truth. I'm confessing that I don't know if I'm ready for this. What is 'this'? Being open. Being hurt. Liking. Not being liked. Seeing the flicker on. Seeing the flicker off. Leaping. Falling. Crashing.
David Levithan